Volume 13 Chapter 382 Sayamu Inko, Release from Prison
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
December 31st, 29:00…
In this massive world, I was the only one who had failed to ring in the New Year.
”Gah! Why?! Why is it always like this, you moron!!” Sayamu Inko yelled.
I faceplanted onto my computer desk. Obviously, that “moron” was directed at nobody but myself.
[Chat: Ahhh, she was so close… ]
[Chat: Wait… isn’t this supposed to be a dating sim? Why was there just a high-speed car chase? ]
[Chat: ↑ Because it’s a trash-tier Otome Game ¹. ]
[Chat: Me: “Oh, Inko is still streaming! Let’s watch!” -> Wangan Dead Knight ²* happens -> Me: 👁️👄👁️ ]
[Chat: Hold up, I just got here. Did she beat the dating sim already? This is definitely Wangan*, right? ]
[Chat: ↑ She’s currently flooring it to make it to Aqua-kun’s concert on time. ]
[Chat: Don’t worry, even those of us who’ve been here since the start are just as confused. That transition was way too sudden lol. ]
I’ve been grinding this shitty Otome Game for over a year now. I thought I’d finally grown immune to the absurdity of characters like Morikawa Kaede or Kohina Yukari.
But this?! This is crossing the line!!
A racing game? Out of nowhere?! And this “Wild Yukari” driving the obstacle car is so bad that her movement is completely erratic! But because she’s in a tuned-up monster and I’m in a bone-stock rental, she’s somehow faster than me for no reason! Why is she even trying to block me anyway?! Just thinking about the real Yukari’s face makes my blood boil!!
”No. Deep breaths. Focus!! I’m just going to drive with a zen mind. If I get worked up trying to dodge her, the stress is literally going to make me go bald!!” Inko muttered.
I reloaded the racing segment. As soon as I hit the expressway, a gaudy pink car driven by Kohina Yukari swerved into my lane.
’Hey, you! You’ve got some nerve picking a fight with me-the Speed Demon of the Circuit!’
”If you’re a Speed Demon, go haunt a race track! This is a public road!!” I screamed back.
I wasn’t even picking a fight!! I’m just trying to keep it pinned at exactly one mile-per-hour under the speed limit!!
[Chat: Logic bomb dropped! ]
[Chat: She’s 100% right though! ]
[Chat: Get her, Inko! Tell her off!! ]
[Chat: Can’t she just floor it and blast past? ]
[Chat: ↑ If she does, the cops’ll get her. ]
[Chat: This game is weirdly obsessed with the law. If you break the speed limit, patrol cars swarm you. Game Over. If you outrun them, you get the “National Most Wanted” ending. ]
[Chat: You have to floor the gas for a split second then coast so the sensors don’t flag you. ]
[Chat: Even if you don’t get a siren, if the speed cameras catch your plate, you get arrested the morning after the concert. Game Over. ]
[Chat: This is harder than the actual Wangan* games!! ]
[Chat: The car physics are so realistic the Gran Turismo* devs are probably sweating. ]
[Chat: What was the dev team thinking with this difficulty curve…? ]
They weren’t thinking at all, obviously!!
Approaching the corner, I took my left hand off the steering wheel controller. I slammed the clutch, downshift to drop the revs, and let the engine braking take the weight.
”Here we go… Now!!”
I flicked the wheel to the right, forcing the car through the turn. This curve was the only window to pass Yukari. At first, I wasted hours trying to drift through, but a regular viewer-Kotono-san-reminded me that since I’m driving a front-wheel drive car, a “grip run” would actually be faster. That advice was a lifesaver.
Damn it! I don’t even have a driver’s license, so why do I have to be this good at technical driving?! Handling a car like this is actually making me want to buy one!! You know what? When I’m done with this, I’m going straight to the DMV. I feel like I could skip the classes and ace the road test in one go!!
”Gotcha!!”
I slammed on the brakes, bringing the car to a dead stop. Kohina Yukari, overcommitting to the chase, lost control and went into a solo wipeout.
[SYSTEM MESSAGE]
RECKLESS DRIVING LEADS TO FATAL ACCIDENTS. STOP THE MADNESS!
– Brought to you by the Wangan Police Department
”Oh, shut up!” I snapped. “Seriously, why is the police department collaborating with a trash game ³ like this?! Do your jobs!!”
Anyway, Yukari shouldn’t be able to follow me now. I’ll just call 911 for the fire and rescue… and there! Done! I shifted back into first gear and merged into the passing lane. Then, something glinted in my rearview mirror.
’I’m late! I’m late!!’
”Why is Morikawa Kaede literally running down the highway?! I mean, she looks the type, and it’s not even weird that she’s faster than a car, but still!!”
This is insane!!
[SYSTEM MESSAGE]
PEDESTRIANS CAN APPEAR AT ANY TIME. DRIVE WITH EXTREME CAUTION.
– The Traffic Safety Committee
No way… the vibe just shifted, didn’t it? I gripped the wheel, my guard up.
[Chat: From Wangan Dead Knight to Driving School Simulator* LMAO. ]
[Chat: Here it comes… the most unfair segment in gaming history. ]
[Chat: Oh yeah, that shitty part where things hit you from off-screen blind spots. ]
[Chat: Theory: No human being can actually pass a driving school simulator. ]
[Chat: Wait, are real driving simulators actually that bad? ]
[Chat: ↑ Imagine a Bullet Hell shooter where you have to dodge bullets that aren’t even on your screen yet. That’s what this is. ]
The devs are actually insane. Why is there a time limit on top of this difficulty?! I carefully nudged the car forward. Suddenly, the screen froze.
No… please, not a crash. Not here…. Just as I felt myself about to pass out, a dialogue box popped up.
[QUIZ TIME]
Your 10-year-old daughter has a fever. When driving her to the hospital, do you secure her in a child seat?
”Hah?! How should I know?! I don’t have a license, and I definitely don’t have kids!!”
Wait… is this a dig at me? Is the game flexing on the fact that I’m not even dating anyone, let alone married?!
I followed my gut and clicked “No.” The screen immediately jerked back to life.
”Hey! You could at least tell me if I got it right!! You put all this effort into these mini-games, but you can’t even give me a ‘Correct’ sound effect?!”
[Chat: Inko, just go get your license. If you can beat this, the real test is a joke. ]
[Chat: Seriously, the real DMV test isn’t even half this hard. ]
[Chat: This game is giving me a 20% pass rate vibe. Peak kusoge. ]
[Chat: [Sommelier]: Is it morning already? Are you guys really saying “shitty” this much? I’m trying to eat my New Year’s curry here. ]
[Chat: ↑ You’re eating curry for breakfast on New Year’s? For real? ]
[Chat: Oh man, is that the time? I better go start the ozoni ⁴ soup. ]
Wait… is it really that late?!
Crap, crap, crap! I need to hurry or the sun’s going to come up on New Year’s Day! I whipped the car into a parking spot near the concert venue and bolted toward the entrance on foot.
”Hey, look at her… she’s got a ticket, doesn’t she?” one woman said.
”Yeah. She’s got that ‘I have a VIP pass’ face,” another replied.
”Hey, lady! Hand over the ticket!!” a third screamed.
”Whoa, back off!!” I yelled.
My character was suddenly surrounded by a mob of bloodthirsty women.
”This is getting ridiculous! It was a racing sim five minutes ago, and now it’s a Yakuza brawler?! I won’t name the franchise, but we all know what this is!!”
I parried the fans swarming me. Thank god I had the foresight to swap the racing wheel for a controller!!
”I’m a pro at this. Stand back!!” I shouted.
After knocking out a few of the “thirsty” fans, the screen cut to a cinematic. This game… the production value is so misplaced.
Wait, what? A Tokyo ticket scalper?
’Listen, lady. I’ll give it to you straight: hand over that ticket. I can flip it for ten times the price, and I’ll even give you a cut. Deal?’
”You’re just a bottom-feeding scalper!! Go straight to hell!!” I screamed.
I had a bad feeling and swapped to my arcade fight-stick just in time!!
I’m a world-class Heaven’s Sword pro! I’ve carried the hopes of the entire Japanese national team on my back! You think some low-rent scalper is going to take me down?! Not a chance!!
I unleashed a year’s worth of built-up frustration, locking the scalper into a literal infinite combo until she was nothing but a pixelated pulp.
[Chat: Inko is a BEAST. lol. ]
[Chat: National Team energy right there. ]
[Chat: That scalper is physically not breathing anymore. ]
[Chat: A total one-sided massacre. She’s too strong LMAO. ]
[Chat: What a satisfying way to start the morning. Thanks, Inko! ]
I ditched the arcade stick and went straight to keyboard and mouse. Why? Because the women watching the fight suddenly started twitching and speaking in broken, hollow voices.
’TICK… ET… GIVE… TICKET…’
”Oh, come on! We’re done with the fighting game and now it’s Thirst Hazard ⁵?!”
I grabbed a nearby water gun and started blasting the mobs in the face, trying to snap them out of it. Suddenly, the city’s emergency broadcast system blared to life.
’The playable area is shrinking. Please proceed to the safe zone immediately.’
”Now it’s a Battle Royale?!”
And why did it switch from third-person to first-person?! My eyes can’t take this! Pick a perspective and stick to it!! Wait-can I build walls?! This isn’t an FPS, it’s that game!!
”I’m out of water!!” I panicked.
I barely made it into the concert hall by the skin of my teeth. The 3D graphics suddenly collapsed into a flat 2D plane.
Now it’s a side-scroller?! I grabbed my controller again.
”The difficulty balance in this game is broken!!” I yelled at the monitor.
I fought through the platforming stage, only to find Morikawa Kaede waiting for me. She started chucking finished banana peels at me like a certain kart-racing game.
”How many bananas can one person eat?! Stop throwing your trash at me!!”
I dodged the peels, cleared the boss stage, and finally… the graphics returned to normal.
Heave… heave… I’m dying. I’m actually dying.
I don’t know how I focused that hard for that long, but there is no way in hell I’m doing that a second time.
[Chat: That “Lonely Up” grind finally paid off!!]
[Chat: Thirty hours of Child Step… that cliff-climb from hell was worth it.]
[Chat: Oof. The “Pot Lady”⁶ trauma is coming back to me…]
[Chat: Inko has that insane stress-gaming endurance.]
[Chat: You can do it, Inko-senpai!]
[Chat: ↑Look at her juniors coming in to cheer her on!!]
[Chat: 9n2-neesan: You’ve made it to the final live performance! Just a little further!]
The staff dialogue event ends, and the screen cuts to the Special Live cinematic.
Man… Inko thought. A reward after all that penance really does soothe the soul.
During the concert, as part of the scripted performance, Aqua-kun returns to the wings of the stage and approaches me.
[Aqua-kun, here! You forgot this!]
”Thanks, Inko,” he replied.
Even though it’s just a game, hearing Aqua-kun drop the honorifics and use my name made my face turn beet red.
[Chat: Look at Inko. She’s gone totally quiet lol.]
[Chat: She’s definitely screaming internally!]
[Chat: Hey, Inko? You still with us?]
[Chat: Inko, no time to space out! We’ve got less than an hour until the first sunrise!!]
”Gah! I know! You don’t have to tell me!” I barked back at the chat.
I pulled myself together and clicked through the dialogue.
”Hey, would you mind… putting this on my head for me?” Aqua-kun asked. “I can’t quite do it myself.”
[Sure.]
Aqua-kun dropped to one knee right in front of me. I reached out and gently placed the crown on his head as he bowed.
Wow… Prince-mode Aqua-kun was literally sparkling. He was perfect. As I stood there, mesmerized by his regal look, a prompt flashed on the screen.
[Prompt: Say something to him as he heads out to the stage.]
A list of choices appeared.
[A: You look great, Aqua-kun.]
[B: I believe in you…!]
[C: We’re counting on you, BERYL’s Ace!!]
[D: Aqua-kun… good luck!]
[E: Everyone’s eyes are on you!]
[F: I’ll leave the rest to you!]
[G: Now, my Prince, go back to your fans.]
[H: Aqua-kun, after this show is over…]
[I: … (Send him off in silence)]
”Wait, wait, wait!” I yelled. “Are you kidding me? These all look like ‘correct’ answers! I am not restarting this run because of a bad dialogue choice!”
[Chat: RIP. She’s softlocked.]
[Chat: It was a good run, Inko. Nice dream.]
[Chat: GG.]
[Chat: 9n2-neesan: Wait, this is different from the route we cleared…]
[Chat: ↑ As expected of the Verification Team, clearing the crap-game⁷ route like it’s nothing lol.]
[Chat: A multi-ending crap-game? LMAO.]
[Chat: Otome no Tashinami: The last one is definitely a trap. This dev loves tricking people.]
[Chat: Inko, look at this!!]
[Chat: RamenHagetoru: If you’re a real woman, you pick H! Trust your thirsty instincts!!]
[Chat: Don’t listen to her!!]
[Chat: Stop it! You’re going to confuse her even more!!]
[Chat: Sommelier: It’s B. Why? Because the instant curry I’m eating has a big B on the box.]
[Chat: You’re lying, right…?]
”Hey… I can trust you guys, right?”
I stared at the comments, my expression turning dead serious.
”Alright, forget it! I’ve got nothing to lose! I’m putting my faith in the Nightmare Generation!”
I clicked option B.
The screen went black.
”No! This is it! The Game Over!” I shrieked. “Is it going to be Wild Kohina Yukari again? Or Wild Morikawa Kaede?!”
But then, a gorgeous high-budget movie began to play.
”Yeah… just believe in me and wait,” Aqua-kun said.
”A GOD-TIER CG! IT’S HERE!”
I jumped out of my chair, pumping my fist in the air.
[Chat: IT’S HAPPENING!]
[Chat: Sommelier, you madman! It actually worked! LOL]
[Chat: Curry saves the day again!!]
[Chat: LOL.]
[Chat: Crap-games and curry… two sides of the same coin.]
[Chat: Otome no Tashinami: Whoa! I’ve never seen this CG before. Thank you!!]
[Chat: Wait, even Tashinami hasn’t seen this?! LOL]
[Chat: Super rare get! Congrats!!]
[Chat: Thanks, Inko. This is my New Year’s gift!!]
The concert ended in a massive success, and the staff roll began to crawl up the screen. I sat there, jaw dropped, staring at the screen.
”I did it… I finally… I CLEARED IT!”
I slumped back, overwhelmed with relief.
[Chat: Congrats, Inko!]
[Chat: Full clear! Let’s go!]
[Chat: I honestly didn’t think you’d make it. Great job!]
[Chat: 9n2-neesan: Thanks for showing us a new ending!]
[Chat: You really did it, kid.]
[Chat: Otome no Tashinami: Inko-san, congrats on the clear!]
[Chat: GG, Inko!!]
[Chat: Manager/Admin: Sniff… I always knew you could do it, Inko-san!]
[Chat: Inko-senpai, you’re the goat!!]
[Chat: RamenHagetoru: Good work, Inko-san!]
[Chat: Sommelier: Told ya. Trust the curry. It’s the Shirogane Estate brand.]
[Chat: ↑ That’s going to be sold out by tomorrow.]
[Chat: Stop it, Sommelier. Do you want to kill the factory workers on New Year’s?]
The credits finished, and the game returned to the main room.
”Wait… what? Was it all a dream?”
I rubbed my sleepy eyes and leaned into the monitor.
[The night before… it really feels like a dream.]
”ANOTHER MOVIE?!” I screamed.
The scene shifted. It was after the live show-just me and Aqua-kun, alone.
[I believed in you… Aqua-kun.]
”Yeah, and I believed in you, too,” he replied softly. “I knew you’d be the one to reach me, Inko.”
”OH MY GOD!”
On the empty stage, Aqua-kun reached out and gently pulled me into an embrace.
No way, no way! I thought. Aqua-kun! If a boy and girl get this close, I’m gonna end up pregnant!
”Inko, I need you,” he whispered. “In my work… and in my life.”
[Aqua-kun… does that mean-?]
He stared into my eyes.
Damn it! He’s too handsome! This is cheating! Looking at that face from two inches away would make anyone a total simp. Suddenly, Yukari’s face flashed in my mind. No, he’s different. He wears those weird T-shirts and has zero taste.
”I’ve said this much and you still don’t get it? It’s like this.”
”WHOAAA!”
His face moved closer, slowly.
This isn’t happening! We haven’t even held hands yet!
I nearly tipped my chair over backward. At the very moment his lips touched mine, the screen faded to black and the words **HAPPY END** appeared.
[Chat: Otome no Tashinami: Alpha-male Aqua-sama is everything. Thank you!!]
[Chat: That was perfect!!]
[Chat: Man, it was worth watching that hellish grind just for this.]
[Chat: Inko seriously, congrats. And thanks for working so hard to show us this!!]
[Chat: 9n2-neesan: That was incredible. I’m going to go find this route myself later!]
[Chat: Why is a crap-game this good?! Twitch Twitch!!]
[Chat: RamenHagetoru: What happened after?! Where’s the spicy scene?!]
[Chat: ↑ There isn’t one, you creep.]
[Chat: Sommelier: Hey, look at the time! It’s the sunrise!!]
”Huh? The sunrise already?! Crap!”
I scrambled to close the game, but one last message box popped up.
[If you’re going to work this hard to beat a crap-game, you should probably try beating a real Otome game for once.]
”YOU PIECE OF-!” I screamed. “We had a perfect ending! We didn’t need that!”
[Chat: LMAO the devs are savage.]
[Chat: Kohina Yukari: Hey, can I beat these devs up one more time?]
[Chat: Do it!]
[Chat: We believe in you, Yukari!!]
[Chat: Everyone’s hearts are one this New Year’s lol.]
[Chat: Truly a legendary stream.]
”I’m counting on you, Yukari…” I muttered.
But I had no time to lose. I grabbed my camera and ran outside, the stream still live. I wanted to see the first sunrise of the year with everyone who stayed with me.
”Everyone! Are you watching?! Look, it’s the sunrise!!”
I held the camera up to the horizon. My adrenaline was redlining, and I hadn’t realized I was at my limit. Suddenly, the world started to spin. My legs felt like jelly, and I started to fall.
[Chat: Hey! Inko, are you okay?]
[Chat: Inko!?]
[Chat: Sommelier: Hey, you pushed yourself too hard!!]
[Chat: Inko?! Someone check on her!!]
[Chat: RamenHagetoru: Don’t worry, I already made the call.]
[Chat: Wait, what?!]
That’s weird… I thought. I felt myself falling, but I didn’t hit the ground. Instead, I felt a solid, warm weight holding me up.
”Honestly… you’re always overdoing it.”
Huh? I should have finished the game… so why was Aqua-kun standing right in front of me?
[Chat: THE REAL ONE IS HERE!]
[Chat: HE’S ACTUALLY THERE! GGs!!]
[Chat: Otome no Tashinami: I need a screenshot of this!!]
[Chat: Nice save, Aqua-sama!]
[Chat: 9n2-neesan: I’m so glad he caught her. Aqua-san, you’re a hero!]
[Chat: Is he… actually better looking than the game version?]
[Chat: HakuryuuAiko: Gasp]
[Chat: ↑ Oh, she’s dead.]
[Chat: Hagetoru, you legend…]
I couldn’t think anymore. My brain was fried. I just let my weight sink into Aqua-kun’s arms.
”Inko-san, thank you for your hard work. And good night. Have a wonderful first dream.”
Sorry, Aqua-kun, I’m sorry for bothering you. But thank you.
As my consciousness gradually faded, I looked at Aqua-kun’s face as it faded, and this thought occurred to me.
After all, the real Aqua-kun is a better guy than the one in the game…
********************************************
Author:
The curry Morikawa-san is eating is a sweet and spicy curry from Shirogane○ in Daisaka, a company produced by S○B.
It’s delicious, so I recommend it. However, it’s sweet and quite spicy, so be careful.
You can buy it at supermarkets even if you don’t go to Daisaka, so please give it a try.
Personally, I think the curry from Aube○gine, which was often served in the dressing room, or the curry here is the best.
By the way, I believe Lawson now sells Aubergine in retort form, so if you like sweet and spicy food, give that a try.
—
Summary:
Inko struggles to finish a bizarre, multi-genre ‘shitty’ Otome Game on New Year’s Eve. The game forces her through a racing sim, a driving school quiz, a Yakuza-style brawler, a zombie-parody shooter, and a Battle Royale before ending in a side-scrolling boss fight. She manages to reach the concert venue just as the game glitches back to its original state.
After a grueling 30-hour gaming marathon, streamer Inko finally clears a difficult ‘crap-game’ (kusoge). She unlocks a rare romantic ending with the idol character Aqua-kun. Exhausted, she rushes outside to stream the first sunrise of the year for her viewers, only to collapse and be caught by the real-life Aqua.
—
Trivia:
- The ’29:00′ time indicates it is actually 5 AM on New Year’s Day.
- The ‘Wild’ versions of characters are NPC parodies within the game, not the actual people.
- The game mechanics punish speeding with a specific ‘National Most Wanted’ Game Over.
- Inko is a legitimate esports champion in fighting games.
- The ‘Thirst Hazard’ enemies are a parody of Resident Evil zombies, but horny.
- The Battle Royale segment features a shrinking safe zone and wall-building mechanics.
- Inko was playing a game called ‘Child Step’ for 30 hours straight.
- The ‘Verification Team’ is a group of players who confirm game content, and they hadn’t seen this ending before.
- The choice that unlocked the true ending was inspired by a brand of instant curry (Shirogane Estate).
- Aqua-kun is a real person and a member of an idol group, not just a game character.
- Inko has a comedic fear of pregnancy resulting from simple physical proximity
—
Character Insight:
Inko demonstrates extreme adaptability and technical skill, proving why she is a pro gamer even when faced with intentionally broken mechanics. Her frustration stems from the game’s lack of internal logic rather than its difficulty.
Inko shows extreme resilience and dedication to her fans, pushing herself past her physical limits. Her internal monologue reveals a contrast between her professional admiration for Aqua and her low opinion of Yukari’s fashion sense.
—
Behind the Scenes:
The chapter parodies several famous game franchises: Wangan Midnight, Yakuza (Like a Dragon), Resident Evil, Fortnite/PUBG, and Mario Kart.
The ‘Pot Lady’ game refers to ‘Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy,’ a notorious ‘foddian’ game known for causing streamer frustration.
—
TL Notes:
Please bookmark this series and rate ☆☆☆☆☆ on here!
Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
Thanks for reading.
Leave a Reply