Chapter 416 Lewd Talk Between the Saint and the Queen
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
”Man, talk about ‘same as ever’—Ken-boy is such a trip, isn’t he?”
As Kento, the owner of the magic circuit shop Harvest¹, made his exit, Saint Loire-Rose spoke up. She was busy fiddling with the Wriggle-Wriggle Dildo-Buddy² he’d just handed her, making the thing squirm. She couldn’t help but chuckle; after such a grueling journey, a gift this ridiculous was exactly the kind of breather she needed.
”Umu. Well, there’s no denying he’s a man who never lets things get dull,” Queen Cecile Canaria replied.
The Queen allowed her expression to soften just a fraction. In truth, “not dull” was the understatement of the century—she was head-over-heels for the man, but she wasn’t about to admit that to her friend.
Of course, for someone like Loire-Rose, reading the Queen’s heart was child’s play. She caught the look in Cecile’s eyes and shot her a meaningful, mischievous grin.
”Hmm…?” Loire-Rose hummed.
”W-what? Why are you looking at me like that?” Cecile asked.
”Oh, nothing. Just thinking that even our Cici is a woman after all.”
”…I have always been a woman.”
”There you go again! So, how far have you two actually gone? You didn’t have this vibe the last time I visited. What the heck happened in the last year and a half!?”
”Good grief, be quiet!”
Cecile tried to push the crowding Saint away, but she didn’t actually deny the charge. Loire-Rose’s grin widened as she backed off, looking quite pleased with herself. Seeing such a cute reaction was a sufficient “dose of romance” for her. If she took in any more, it would probably overwhelm her—starved as she was by the drab, celibate atmosphere of the Church.
”So, what even is this thing?” Loire-Rose asked, lifting the toy.
”A new product from that shop. I assume you can figure out the application?”
”I mean, yeah, I get it, but…”
Kento hadn’t given Loire-Rose a detailed manual. He’d been satisfied with just getting a laugh, and he’d wanted to show a modicum of respect for her status as a Saint. Though, considering the Tremble-Dildo-Buddy was already in her repertoire, that ship had long since sailed.
”And what about these other prototypes he left?”
”Apparently… the ‘Nip-Clit Licker’³ and the ‘Backdoor Beetle (Provisional)’⁴,” Cecile explained.
”The ‘Nip-Clit Licker’…”
”Umu.”
”The ‘Backdoor Beetle’…”
”…Umu.”
”Pff—! Pff-hahaha! Oh man, stop! Ahahahahahaha!”
Loire-Rose doubled over, just as she had when she first saw the Wriggle-Wriggle. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d laughed this hard—it might have actually been the day of the Heresy Trial for the Tremble-Dildo-Buddy.
”Haa… haa… Oh, man… that’s hilarious. Can I… try turning this on?”
”Do what you want,” Cecile said.
”Alright, don’t mind if I do!”
Once her laughter subsided, her curiosity took over. She’d been receiving Harvest products through Archbishop Trantestar for a while, so she was already a pro at operating them. The switches were usually on the bottom. The one that caught her eye was the one with the absolutely insane name—the Nip-Clit Licker.
”…Whoa.”
In the center of the cup-shaped device, three protrusions began to squirm. They moved in a writhing, snake-like fashion that was, honestly, a little unsettling to look at. However, the use-case was immediately intuitive.
”…It’s less of a ‘lick’ and more of a ‘knead,’ isn’t it?” Loire-Rose noted.
”I wouldn’t know. If you have a complaint, take it up with the manufacturer.”
”It’s not a complaint, it’s just… intense. Wow. Wait… so you put this on your n**ipss, or… your clitoris?”
”Yes. The stimulation is quite strong, so do not forget to use lubricant.”
”Oho… you sure are well-informed. Have you already tested it out, Cici?”
”Well, as Queen, I have every item presented to me for ‘safety verification’ the moment it’s completed.”
”Is that right…?”
This was deeper than Loire-Rose had imagined. The Queen was completely hooked—either on the shop, or perhaps the owner himself. The Saint leaned in, her interest fully piqued.
”…So, how did it feel?”
”Why don’t you try it yourself, Lora? Let’s just say it’s a ‘Great Invention’ on par with the Tremble-Ddo-Buddy.”
”Oh…!”
That was high praise indeed. Loire-Rose experimentally stuck her finger into the center of the three squirming protrusions. She shivered as her fingertip was stroked and kneaded from all sides. To have this on a n**ips… or even better, the clitoris… She swallowed hard and looked back at Cecile.
”Then, what about this ‘Backdoor Beetle’…?”
”I exercise my right to remain silent.”
”You might as well have just told me! Wait, wait… don’t tell me, Cici, you actually use that ‘Slime-Pal’⁵…”
”I exercise my right to remain silent.”
”Whoa… That’s hardcore. Even in the Holy City, only the really ‘dedicated’ priestess use those…”
”…What? Is that so?” Cecile asked, sounding surprised.
”Yeah. I mean, I tried my best, but the hurdle is way too high for your average practitioner.”
”……”
”Wait, what’s with that face!? It’s a huge deal, right? Keeping a slime inside your stomach!?”
”……”
”Cici!?”
Cecile couldn’t bring herself to say it. She couldn’t tell her friend that here in the Royal Capital, it wasn’t just “practitioners”—even ordinary citizens were using them in droves. In fact, among the nobility, more than half the population was currently “keeping a slime in their bellies.”
My country might be in trouble, Cecile thought. When had they become so “poisoned” by Harvest? They were now a world leader in adult magic circuits. Well, considering the health and mood benefits, it wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but still…
”Anyway, it doesn’t matter,” Cecile said, clearing her throat. “That man was worried this product might end up in another Heresy Trial. What’s your take?”
”I see, I see… So Cici is already ‘fully developed’ from head to toe. No wonder you look at Ken-boy with those eyes…”
”LORA!!!”
”Okay, okay! My bad! Right, the Heresy Trial. Hmm… honestly, it’s probably fine.”
Loire-Rose had been staring at Cecile’s lower half, her mind racing with the image of a Slime-Pal being tucked away in there. She snapped back to the conversation.
”I need more than just ‘probably fine’…”
”Well, I won’t know for sure until I really test it. But if this is the extent of the movement, it shouldn’t be a problem, right?”
”Try pushing that switch in one more click,” Cecile suggested.
”Wait, this? …Whoa!?”
As soon as she pressed it, the Nip-Clit Licker began to writhe even more violently. Loire-Rose let out a small “Oh…!” as her imagination began to run wild.
”…Is it too much?” Cecile asked.
”No… it’s right on the edge. Either way, I’m gonna have to give this a very thorough test drive… Though, I guess that’ll have to wait until after this whole mess is resolved.”
”My country will provide our full support. Do not worry so much.”
”Yeah, thanks. I’ll be fine. Honestly, now that I’ve seen stuff like this, I can’t afford to kick the bucket yet!”
Cecile wondered if that was really the right motivation, but she was glad her friend was cheered up. If only everyone in the world had “pink-colored” brains like that man, the world would be a much more peaceful place. As that thought crossed her mind, Cecile gave a wry inner smile, realizing just how “poisoned” she really was.
”Also, I guess there’s Ken’s ‘secret plan.’ I wonder if it’ll actually work.”
”Who knows… Ideally, we’d solve this without it, but if it’s Lady Tania’s idea, I wouldn’t worry. You can rest easy—you’re in good hands.”
”The ‘Witch of Fresh Verdure,’ right? You really trust her.”
”We don’t call her that here. If we couldn’t trust her, there wouldn’t be a single soul left in this country to rely on. If I even suggested otherwise, the heroic spirits of my ancestors would probably rise up and beat me to a pulp.”
”Got it. Then, about the talk with the Archbishop and the others…”
”Yes, regarding that…”
And so, having safely welcomed the Saint, the Kingdom of Canaria began making steady, if anxious, preparations for the return of Amelia and her companions.
—
Summary:
Loire-Rose (the Saint) returns to the capital and meets with Queen Cecile. Kento provides several new adult magic circuit prototypes, which leads to a comedic and lewd bonding session between the two women. Cecile’s deep immersion into adult toy culture is revealed, much to Loire-Rose’s shock.
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Trivia:
- Cecile keeps a slime inside her body for ‘training/pleasure’.
- More than half the nobility in the capital now use slimes.
- The term ‘Heresy Trial’ refers to the legal/religious backlash against Kento’s toys.
- Lady Tania is the legendary Witch of Fresh Verdure, highly respected in Canaria
—
Character Insight:
Cecile is shown to be much more ‘developed’ and corrupted by Kento’s items than she lets on publicly. Loire-Rose, despite her status, is surprisingly open-minded and eager to try new s*xual magic circuits.
—
Behind the Scenes:
The author uses the girls’ talk to contrast the heavy political situation with the absurdity of the adult magic shop’s growth.
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TL Notes:
Notes:
• Loire-Rose – The current Saintess, possessing a divine appearance yet a modern, playful, and irreverent attitude that clashes with Church tradition. She has white hair, pale skin, blue eyes, and wears clergy robes.
• Kento – The owner of the magic tool shop ‘Harvest,’ which discretely sells adult goods. He’s a former overworked, ordinary salaryman from modern Japan who was suddenly transported (isekai’d) to this fantasy world. He has dark hair and an unremarkable appearance, typically wearing a plain, slightly suspicious-looking shop owner’s clothes looks like Kazuma Satou from certain series. He has a minimal amount of magic power, enough to craft his specialty items.
• Cecile – A queen in the capital who possesses the authority to regulate business and commerce, particularly concerning moral or public order issues. She is currently investigating Kento’s shop, ‘Harvest.’ Have long golden hair, elegant, and wearing expensive white dress with gold accesories.
• Trantestar – The middle-aged man Archbishop of Canarias and the initiator of the current trial. He is an alleged ally of Kento but remains suspiciously neutral.
• Tania – An Elf adventurer who, despite her race’s reputation for low sex drive, is secretly quite passionate. She initially seemed ‘wasted’ (emotionally dry) to her friend Raika, but was easily introduced to the pleasure-items sold at ‘Harvest.’ She is easily embarrassed and attempts to maintain a dignified facade, despite her recent, frequent purchases. She wears practical but light armor over a simple cloth tunic and short pants, highlighting her grace and agility. Her primary relationship is one of friendly senior-junior with Raika.
• Witch of Fresh Verdure – A legendary elf from the Age of Heroes. She is a true ‘magic user’ from an era before formalized magic systems. She is an old friend of the Canaria Kingdom’s founding king.
• Amelia – The Sister of the Church of Demon-Subjugating, who usually buys from Kento, has light blue hair.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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