Volume 7 Chapter 2 A Leaden Departure
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
Today is a rare holiday.
Gretel has gone out to shop in the castle town, leaving a deep, heavy silence in our room. Sunlight comes in through the window, and I watch tiny bits of dust floating in the air. No one else is here.
Suddenly, the quiet settles over me so strongly that I almost feel its weight.
……Should I seek comfort with my fingertips again, like I did last night?
For a moment, that sweet, tempting thought passes through my mind, but I grit my teeth and throw off the covers. If I stay any longer in the warmth and smell that fills this small room, I might truly lose my mind.
I put on my clothes and hurry out to the castle town, almost as if something is chasing me.
I walk along the cobblestone streets without a goal. The market is just as busy as always.
”Fresh turnips here!” “Salted meat, get it cheap!”
The vendors’ rough voices call out again and again. The smells of fresh vegetables, hot cooking meat, and horse manure on the street all mix together. It presses in on me, thick and strong, like the market itself is a huge animal.
Just a little while ago, I was shivering alone in my room, trying to find comfort with just my fingertip. Now, standing among all this loud, busy life, it feels so bright to me that it almost hurts, and yet I also hate it.
”Erika! It’s been a while!” Maria calls out, waving with a big, bright smile. Her voice, made stronger by days in the sun, wakes up all the dark feelings at the bottom of my heart.
”…Hello, Maria,” I answer, my voice kept flat and guarded.
”Working yourself too hard again? You’ll start looking old if you don’t rest sometimes!”
Maria pulls me by the arm, leading me into a small café down an alley. We sit at a worn wooden table. The cheap herbal tea they bring smells sharp, like medicine.
”Hey, Erika. Are you okay? You look like you might just turn see-through,” Maria asks, truly worried.
”…I’m fine. Just a little short on sleep.”
I drink the tea. The warm liquid goes down my throat and settles in my stomach. The strong taste of the herbs seems to wash away, if only a little, the heavy, slow feeling that comes after comforting myself.1
”You’re in the technical corps, right, Erika? At least you don’t have to carry heavy rifles. That’s a relief.”
”…Yeah. I’m okay.”
Maria chatters about a new shop and cute clothes. To me, it sounds like something from another world, far from my life filled with oil and smoke. While she talks, I find myself thinking about the lie I just told.
After we part ways, I pack some hard black bread and wilted vegetables into my bag and head for the church.
The moment I step into the stone sanctuary, the noise outside fades away as if it was never real. Bright, colorful light pours from the high ceiling through the stained glass, and in that light, bits of dust float quietly.
I kneel in front of the altar. The cold stone floor hurts my knees. That pain feels like a punishment I give myself, so I lean into it on purpose. I lace my fingers together in front of my chest. My fingertips are cold like ice. I don’t know what to pray for. I only wish that this cold and pain can soften my muddy heart, even just a little.
Evening. Back at the barracks, I pick up my pen.
’Mother, I am doing well. Work is going smoothly. I am still searching for my brother. As for a good man…’
All of it is a lie.
Work isn’t going smoothly. I haven’t found my brother. There isn’t a good man.
(I’m sorry, Mother. I… I haven’t been able to do anything…)
I put the letter in an envelope and drip melted wax onto it. The deep sound as the wax hits the paper echoes inside me.
The letter is for my mother, but its words aren’t true. My fingers, hidden in my bag, are shaking a little.
* * *
The following Wednesday, in the afternoon, a sudden trumpet blast rings out, reaching all the way to the underground workshop. The loud, sharp sound bounces off the stone walls and goes straight into my ears.
My heart jumps, beating in an uneasy, wet rhythm.
”What is that?” Karl asks, looking up from his work.
I stop working and look up too. I have a strong feeling, like a giant machine has started moving somewhere I can’t see.
I stand up quickly and run for the surface, taking the stone stairs two at a time. My lungs start to burn.
When I arrive at the square, thousands of soldiers have already gathered in thick lines, like a dark, moving wave. The hot air is filled with fear and excitement mixed together.
I make my way through the crowd until I finally spot Gretel and slide in next to her.
”Gentlemen!”
A man appears on the platform—white hair and a face as hard as stone. Lieutenant General Gerhard von Zeck. His deep, heavy voice makes the whole square go silent, strong enough that no one can turn away.
”By order of the Empire, I command an expedition!”
Murmurs run through the crowd. For a second, it feels as though my own heart has stopped.
”Our target is the deepest part of the Magic Forest! There is a plunderer inside, eating up the Empire’s Magic!”
The Magic Forest…. I’ve never even heard of it.
”The edge of the map.” “The shadow in the blank space.” The soldiers nearby whisper, some scared, some hungry for action.
”On the Empire’s honor, destroy them! Find what’s hurting the Empire, and wipe it out!”
Every word feels like a thorn, sticking straight into my chest.
A plunderer… Is it something with a heart?
Will these same hands of mine help to shoot and kill someone, or something, using the guns I fixed until I couldn’t feel my fingers?
”Waaaaaaahhhh!!”
Applause and cheers explode. All around me, the men in the square lift their fists and shout until their voices are almost gone. It doesn’t sound like happiness—it feels more like everyone is trying to cover up their fear.
”Departure is in one month! Prepare yourselves!”
The Lieutenant General steps down. Suddenly, time unfreezes, and the square changes into chaos.
”An expedition?” “What’s inside? Demons?” “It’s a nest of monsters pulling in all the Magic.”
The wild guesses just make everyone more nervous.
I look at Gretel. She stares back, her face completely pale.
”Erika…” Gretel whispers quietly.
”…”
My throat closes up. No words come out. Only the smell of oil left on my fingertips feels heavy and real.
……That night, back in the room, I can’t sleep.
Outside the window, the darkness is so deep it seems to swallow everything. I hear Gretel rolling in her bed, her mattress creaking. I know I’m not the only one awake.
”Erika… are you up?” Gretel asks in the dark.
”…I am.”
”I… I’m scared.”
”…Me too.”
”But I’m not going. I’ll definitely be chosen for fortress defense. They need people here to fix the cannons, too.”
I’m glad…. Deep inside, I do feel relief that Gretel won’t have to face the guns and fighting. But at the same time, a feeling of being left behind, of being tossed alone into that pitch-black forest, squeezes my heart tightly.
”Are you… going, Erika?”
”…Probably. The gun mechanics are needed on the front line.”
”That’s…” Gretel’s voice shakes, heavy with tears she hasn’t let fall. My own eyes, before I notice, start to blur with tears too.
”It’s alright… I’ll come back. I promise.”
What I say is just another empty promise. There isn’t anything in this stone room—not a single thing—to prove I’ll ever return.
Everyone is talking about it. The terrible monsters, the dangerous Magic Forest.
* * *
Early morning. Before dawn, while the world is still covered in deep blue darkness.
At the gate of Nordval Fortress, five thousand soldiers are already gathering in silence, like iron.
That one month has passed—sleepless night after night, rushing to check weapons again and again, sorting piles of Magic Stones and spare parts. Looking back, it all feels like one short, strange dream.
I put my pack on my back and head to the main gate through the cold morning air.
The weight presses down on me—the toolkit for fixing Magic Guns, extra chambers, sorted Magic Stones. The leather straps dig into my shoulders, cutting off the blood and making my hands go numb. Every step I take, the heavy load bumps against me, and my back feels tight.
Am I really supposed to carry all this for a thousand kilometers? The thought nearly makes me faint with worry.
In the square, I smell iron, leather, and the breath of warhorses. The supply wagons creak in line, and the Magic field cannons sit waiting like huge beasts.
There is so much military strength gathered here. Still, it doesn’t feel like glory—it feels cold, wet, and scary.
”Erika!” Gretel runs up, out of breath, her hair still messy.
”Come back safely! You have to! We’ll share that terrible soup again when you return!”
”…Yeah.”
Gretel hugs me as tightly as she can, as though I’m about to break. She’s warm and soft, and her warmth runs into my cold body.
I stop myself from crying by biting my lip until it hurts and forcing the tears down.
”All troops, fall in!”
The order comes down without mercy.
The soldiers’ boots and equipment clank and crash, lining up like they’re part of one huge machine.
I push through the pain in my shoulders and stand in line with my unit.
”Let’s do our best together, Erika,” Joachim says next to me.
”…Yeah.”
Joachim’s hands shake as he tries to encourage me, but I can’t find a single thing to say back, only watch his trembling.
Suddenly, I see Corporal Johann in the row beside us. When he notices me, he forces a nervous smile. He lifts his thumb, awkward but maybe meant as thanks for a repair I did earlier.
From behind Johann, a bigger man hits him on the back, laughing.
That’s Corporal Martin, who leans in and whispers something in Johann’s ear with a slimy grin. Johann turns red all the way down his neck, and the two keep glancing at me.
I rub my face with the sleeve of my work glove.
Is my face really so funny? Or am I just something for the men to make jokes about?
A cold feeling pools deep in my chest.
……Pwooooooo-oh! !
A low, roaring trumpet call rolls through the misty morning like a beast’s growl.
”Advance!” Lieutenant General Zeck shouts.
The march begins.
Thump, thump, thump…
Thousands of boots hit the ground at once, shaking the earth with each step.
Kits, canteens, and Magic Stones clank and ring. Horses whinny.
All the sounds come together like the roar of a giant animal.
I turn to look back just once.
The fortress slowly pulls away behind me. Far up on the city wall, in the morning fog, Gretel is waving—just a tiny, faraway spot of color.
I can’t see her face anymore. She’s only a faint point of light, almost fading away.
…Goodbye, Gretel.
The tears I tried to hold back finally fall, cold on my cheeks.
I turn toward what’s ahead.
Beyond the horizon, the Magic Forest waits, covered in black mist. It’s like it wants nothing to do with us. My heart beats loudly with a heavy, uneasy feeling.
Will I really make it back alive?
One step, then another. I keep going.
I don’t know that somewhere in the darkness, a giant green mouth—Agito—is already waiting to swallow us whole.
—
Summary:
Erika enjoys a rare, melancholic holiday in a city market while struggling with internal isolation. Her routine is shattered by a mandatory military expedition into the mysterious, dangerous Magic Forest. As she marches toward an uncertain fate with her unit, she realizes she is leaving behind her only sense of home.
—
Trivia:
The protagonist is a mechanic for ‘Magic Guns’.
The Empire believes the Magic Forest is the source of plunderers consuming ‘Magic elements’.
The weight of her equipment—thirty kilograms—is a constant physical anchor for her despair.
Corporal Johann and Corporal Martin represent the crude, often alienating social environment Erika navigates.
—
Translation Notes:
Notes:
• Gretel – A blonde-haired female soldier who acts as Erika’s roommate. She is energetic and attempts to maintain a sense of normalcy in the barracks.
• Erika – A twenty-three-year-old female mechanic with golden hair dulled by oil, blue eyes, and dark circles under her eyes. She carries a burn scar on her left arm and struggles with dissociation.
• Karl – A mechanic with a hunched back who works in the underground workshop alongside Erika.
• Zeck – Commander of the Empire’s Eastern Expeditionary Force. He wears a luxurious military uniform and carries a saber, favoring heavy artillery bombardment as a solution to problems.
• Johann – A sergeant with pale eyes who relies on Erika for the maintenance of his equipment.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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