Chapter 55 The Third Night Massage ⑧
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
”Anyway, I’m getting ahead of myself,” I said. “I was telling you about the Class President…”
I pulled the conversation back to the matter at hand. Jane’s agenda hadn’t budged an inch since we last spoke, and frankly, my own chaotic sex life was the least of our worries.
”It turns out Sakura-san overheard you egging on the Class President, Jane,” I continued. “And from that one conversation, she managed to piece a whole lot together.”
I explained how Sakura had realized they didn’t necessarily have to return to their old world, and that while she didn’t plan on spreading it around for now, she’d used that leverage to negotiate a ‘hands-off’ policy for the Class President today. Jane listened, nodding along, before she eventually pressed a palm to her forehead and let out a weary sigh.
”I offer my humblest apologies,” Jane said. “It was a grave oversight on my part to allow Sakura-sama¹ to catch wind of our designs… desuwa. I should have been more vigilant of our surroundings.”
”Hey, don’t beat yourself up over it,” I replied. “Sakura-san also said it’s fine, as long as I don’t lay a finger on the Class President just for tonight.”
”It is fortunate that Sakura-sama is so understanding, but that does not diminish my failure,” Jane insisted. “I cannot help but feel a bitter sense of regret… especially considering that, had I not slipped up, your relationship with Owa-sama might have reached a new climax tonight.”
She looked genuinely dejected. I felt like I was kicking her while she was down, but I had to deliver the rest of the bad news.
”So, the Class President… she was being pretty ‘forward’ with her temptations,” I said. “But I turned her down because of what I promised Sakura-san. I told her ‘not today, wait until tomorrow.’ And then she told me, ‘You’d better be prepared for tomorrow,’ and ‘If I find out you turned me down just to crawl into Jane’s bed, there will be hell to pay.’ So… yeah. I don’t think I can play along with you tonight, Jane.”
”Wha…?” Jane gasped.
Jane just stared at me, her face a mask of pure, unadulterated shock. It was as if I’d started speaking a language she’d never heard before. I felt terrible. A few seconds passed before the reality of the situation finally pierced through her brain, and her head slumped forward in defeat. My guilt doubled.
”I… I see how it is,” Jane muttered. “No, I have no right to complain. This is the harvest of my own careless seeds. But really, what was Owa-sama thinking? Perhaps I goaded her a bit too fiercely… No, wait. She only said you mustn’t give in to temptation-desuwa, correct? In that case, surely attending to your bath would be permissible? That is merely a daily chore, not a seduction. It wouldn’t be a problem at all! And if things were to become… a little spirited during the scrubbing, well, we could simply call it a happy accident-desuwa!”
”I mean, I wouldn’t mind, but let me ask you this,” I countered. “If you were in the Class President’s shoes, would you think it wasn’t a problem? Would you honestly look at that and say, ‘Oh, he definitely didn’t give in to temptation’?”
”It would be completely unacceptable-desuwa…” Jane admitted.
Figures. It turned out the ‘Jane-Filter’ was a lot more unforgiving when applied to herself.
”Very well,” Jane said. “I shall leave your care tonight entirely to Corinna. However… should your carnal desires become truly… unbearable… please do not hesitate to call for me. I will find a way to handle it.”
I had a few questions about what exactly “handling it” entailed, but I had more pressing business to discuss, so I let it slide for now.
”Moving on – about the hair removal²,” I said. “Were you able to get that Appraisal Magic Tool³?”
”Yes,” Jane replied. “Stella stopped by earlier. She said she’ll have it ready by breakfast tomorrow. I’ll pick it up then, and after I’m done with it, I’ll hand it off to probably Ena – she’s scheduled to visit tomorrow morning – to return it.”
”Wow, you already settled all that? That was fast,” I remarked.
”A peculiar little creature simply took it upon itself to finish the task,” Jane said dismissively. “Please, pay it no mind.”
I wondered when they’d managed to hammer all that out. Jane had been in the waiting room with everyone else until just a moment ago. And what the hell was this “peculiar creature” that just did work on its own?
”Furthermore, regarding your hair removal ability,” Jane continued. “I have taken the liberty of asking the other Summoned Ones to keep it strictly confidential. I’ve instructed them not to mention it outside of this room-desuwa. So, Lord Anma, please be careful not to let it slip while you’re in the dining hall or elsewhere.”
”I mean, sure, I get it,” I said. “But is hair removal really that dangerous? I figured it’d be way safer than the breast enhancement massages, since I’m not, you know, grabbing anything.”
”On the surface, yes,” Jane explained. “But the issue is far more complex than that. And for once, the local nobility isn’t actually the problem.”
I gave her a confused look, and Jane, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain.
”I believe the girls in the Production Group have already set their minds on having the procedure done,” Jane said. “To them, your ability is nothing short of a miracle. That is why I silenced them by telling them that if word got out, you’d be so swamped with requests that you’d never have time to get to them.”
”Smart,” I agreed. “That sounds like a pretty effective threat.”
I nodded along, thinking she’d handled it perfectly. Then, Jane added with a completely straight face, “Of course, that was a total lie.”
Wait, what?
”The women of this kingdom are constitutionally blessed with very little body hair; they do not suffer the same ‘afflictions’ as the Summoned Ones,” Jane said. “You might get a few curious ladies, but certainly not enough to keep you busy. Besides, most noblewomen wouldn’t dream of exposing their skin to a man just for something as trivial as hair removal – and if they don’t care, their husbands won’t either.”
Now that I thought about it, I’d seen a fair amount of skin in this world already, and I’d never noticed anyone who looked like they needed a shave. I guess it wasn’t that they were all perfectly groomed; they were just born that way. If that was the case, why the gag order? Jane saw the question on my face and continued.
”Consider what would happen if the girls started chatting about this in the dining hall,” Jane posited. “How far do you think that story would travel?”
”I don’t know… to the other students? Maybe the maids and the ladies-in-waiting?” I asked. “But they’re all part of the Princess faction, so I figured they were safe.”
”We are safe-desuwa,” Jane clarified. “The danger lies with the women of the Subjugation Squad⁴.”
Ah. Those girls. I didn’t really know them; we weren’t on friendly terms, and I’d never given any of them a massage. But why were they a problem? Wouldn’t they just want an appointment too? It might be a bit more work, but –
”If it ended there, it would be fine,” Jane said. “The true peril begins if word leaks to the men of the Subjugation Squad. To put it bluntly: if those soldiers hear that ‘Lord Anma is spending his days rubbing oil all over their female classmates while they’re wearing nothing but swimsuits,’ there is no telling how they might react.”
”Oh. Right. Yeah, I see how that ends poorly for me,” I said.
They’d probably lynch me. Or at the very least, I’d be hauled off to some dungeon. The people of this kingdom might not execute me for it, but there was no way the other guys from my world would just sit back and let that slide.
”If the Subjugation Squad were to demand your isolation as a condition for continuing their quest to slay the Demon King, the Crown would likely be forced to comply, at least officially,” Jane explained. “Of course, Her Highness would still visit you in your confinement… and I would move in with you, naturally.”
”Wait, you’d move in too?” I asked.
”Certainly,” Jane replied. “However, a prison – no matter how gilded – is hardly a comfortable environment. It is in our best interest to keep your activities as clandestine as possible.”
She had a point. I made a mental note to keep my mouth shut. Forever.
—
Author:
Stella: “I worked so hard for Lord Anma’s sake, and you call me a ‘peculiar creature’? That’s so mean!”
Jane: “Any girl who spends over an hour sulking in the back of a closet is, by definition, a peculiar creature-desuwa.”
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Summary:
Anma and Jane discuss the fallout of Sakura discovering their plans regarding the Class President. Jane reveals she has secured an Appraisal Magic Tool through Stella to assist with Anma’s new hair removal ability. They conclude by discussing the political necessity of keeping Anma’s intimate massages a secret from the jealous male members of the Subjugation Squad.
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Character Insight:
Jane shows a mix of professional regret and personal jealousy, attempting to rationalize bath-time ‘accidents’ to maintain her closeness with Anma. Anma displays a growing awareness of the dangerous social position he occupies in this new world.
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Behind the Scenes:
The chapter highlights the ‘Isekai’ trope of modern hygiene (hair removal) being a revolutionary concept, as well as the ‘gilded cage’ theme common in royal palace settings.
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TL Notes:
Notes:
• Jane – A maid with light blue hair. She has an AA-cup breast size and is desperate for breast enhancement.
• Sakura – Sakura Yui. A petite student with super-long black hair (145cm) and an A-cup chest.
• Corinna – A maid with black hair wearing a maid outfit. She is described as having very large breasts that bounce when she moves.
• Stella – General manager of health-related affairs. She has F-cup breasts and is described as shy around men.
• Ena – A handmaiden with a C-cup breast size, medium brown hair, and an earnest expression, often blushing or showing clumsy moments. She has a strong, gutsy build and wears practical handmaiden attire.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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