Chapter 169 Embers
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
It began as a mere spark. A spark so minuscule it seemed impossible that it might eventually incinerate an entire nation. A flickering, unreliable ember that looked as though it would vanish in an instant if one stopped feeding it fuel.
”Hey, did you hear?”
”I heard, I heard!”
”Wait, what are you talking about…?” a young woman asked.
”Oh, you haven’t heard?”
”Ugh, you’re so behind the times.”
”What? Hey, tell me! What’s the story?!”
”Hmm, should we tell her?”
”I don’t know, is it okay to let her in on this…?”
”Just tell me already! Enough with the teasing!” the girl snapped.
”Hehe, alright then. I’ll tell you.”
”Hehehe, I guess it can’t be helped.”
”Fine, forget it then…”
”Now, now.”
”You’d better listen close!”
”It’s about the ‘Ddo-Buddy¹‘!” they chimed in unison.
”Th-the… the little p-pecker… buddy…?!”
* * *
On street corners, women clutching shopping bags; in the academy library, schoolgirls whispering in the shadows; in taverns after work, female adventurers enjoying their cups; and in the quiet corners of social gatherings, noble ladies and debutantes alike—all were uttering that name.
Quite by chance, the name that Kento, the owner of the magic tool shop ‘Harvest²,’ had bestowed with a wicked grin—musing how amusing it would be if it actually caught on—had become the primary topic of conversation for every woman in the Coalmine Kingdom³.
”They say it was invented by some magic toolmaker in the Canaria Kingdom⁴.”
”Canaria? Aren’t we at war with them right now?”
”Exactly. I heard a certain merchant stocked up on a massive hoard before the fighting started. Or maybe he crossed the border at the risk of his life just to buy them…”
”Really? I heard a high-ranking priest from the church brought them back for the nuns and the most devout followers.”
”There are all sorts of theories. Anyway, the one I heard was about the merchant. But you know, the ‘Ddo-Buddy’ wasn’t even what the merchant actually wanted to bring back.”
”What do you mean? Are you saying there’s something even more incredible than the ‘Ddo-Buddy’ being sold in Canaria?”
”That’s exactly it. Look, look at this flyer!”
”Let’s see… ‘Drill Ddo-Buddy’, ‘Ribbed Ddo-Buddy’, ‘Pulsed Ddo-Buddy’…?!”
”That’s right. The ‘Ddo-Buddy’ actually comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes.”
”That’s not all. Look here—the ‘Ddo-Buddy’ is originally meant to be paired with various aphrodisiacs and lotions.”
”Canaria is so progressive… I’d heard that since it’s a Queen’s country, women are much more liberated than they are here…”
At first, it was nothing more than rumors. However, as the number of people who managed to acquire a ‘Ddo-Buddy’ grew, the scattered flyers gradually revealed the full scope of the phenomenon.
* * *
The Coalmine Kingdom is locked away by snow during the long winters. The women, keenly sensitive to the subtle sense of stagnation permeating their lives, projected their dreams onto the ‘Beautiful Canaria’ in a way far different from the men.
The ‘Beautiful Canaria’—a land where one could supposedly live without depending on or currying favor with fathers, husbands, or households; without needing to please the village men or the influential figures of the streets. Through the ‘Ddo-Buddy,’ they felt a breeze of that freedom.
”Oh, you don’t know? That shop’s wares aren’t all so innocent. Take a look at the back! The back side!”
”Wait, what…? It’s true there are some strangely shaped ‘Ddo-Buddies’ here, but…”
”You dummy, the most important thing on the back is this!”
”‘Slime-kun Who Dwells in a Woman’s Arse’…? Wait, the… the rear hole?! Is this… is it really for…?!” she stammered.
”Exactly. The items on the back are special models made for the back passage. Since you can use them without losing your purity, I heard they’re incredibly popular with the younger girls…!”
”N-no way! Really?! Th-that’s… eeeeeh?!”
Despite never having tried one, they spoke with absolute authority, pointing at flyers so heavily read and folded that the creases were worn white. Together, they let these slightly scandalous rumors blossom.
Precisely because these weren’t tales that could be discussed out loud, they were all the more alluring. It was perhaps a vent for the vague anxieties and frustrations caused by the trade restrictions lingering since last year and the war that had dragged on since spring.
”And, and?! That’s not even the end of it!”
”Wait, are you really going to tell her about that one too?”
”What, what? Is there something else?!”
”Hehehe, seeing is believing. Actually, I have a special item here that I managed to get my hands on in secret!”
”No way! You actually got ‘that’?!”
”What is it?! Hurry up and tell me!”
Like smugglers dealing in illicit substances, they furtively produced the ‘Tremble-Ddo-Buddy⁵‘ from beneath a cloak.
Unlike the standard ‘Ddo-Buddy’ models brought in by the crate, these were sold only to a very select group of ‘premium’ customers—meaning comrades who had shown support for the anti-war movement.
At first, the women tilted their heads at the device, which appeared no different from a normal ‘Ddo-Buddy’ at a glance. Of course, for those who hadn’t even seen a standard one yet, it was already a startling sight…
”H-hey! Not out in the open like this…”
”You, quiet! So… is it true? Is the rumor real…?”
”Now, now, settle down. I’ll show you right now…”
When the switch was toggled, the ‘Tremble-Ddo-Buddy’ began to vibrate with a low v-v-vvt! sound. The women frantically scanned their surroundings, and once they confirmed the coast was clear, they leaned in close, staring as if entranced.
The women reflexively gulped. As they were allowed to fearfully take turns holding it, they could already envision the pleasure it would bring. But after a tantalizing glimpse, the item was swiftly tucked back into a pocket.
”Ah…”
”Hehe, you see? This is the product that the merchant who smuggled the ‘Ddo-Buddy’ into this country truly wanted to source. It’s a special item, only a few have made it in so far…”
”H-how did you get one?! Do you think if I asked you…!”
”I’m sorry, but even I can’t manage that. I only got this one after begging and pleading for ages…”
”No way…”
”H-hey? By any chance, have you even gotten your hands on ‘that’ one yet…?!”
”Ah, ‘that’ one, huh… Unfortunately, they wouldn’t sell ‘that’ to me either.”
”Wait, what’s ‘that’ one…?”
”The ‘Hot-Hot Ddo-Buddy⁶‘!” they exclaimed.
* * *
There was no end to the women’s chatter. They gathered frequently, indulging in rumors regarding the wares from ‘Harvest.’ Known only through flyers, pamphlets, and the whispers of merchants, the products never failed to captivate them.
There were wives who pleaded with their husbands to find a way to get one. There were women who besieged the merchants and the church themselves. Some even attempted to cross the border, only to be detained by military police or the army…
Gradually, the women began to whisper different rumors. Voices that could be heard intermingled with the talk of the ‘Ddo-Buddy.’
”If only this war would end…”
* * *
By that time, summer was already on the wane. Bit by bit, the people began to recall the autumn harvest and the grueling winter to follow. The war that had commenced in spring—and was expected to conclude by summer—had yet to even cross the border line.
The ember was no longer just an ember; it had grown into a roaring bonfire, and before anyone realized it, small fires had broken out and spread to the main house. Plumes of flame were rising all across the Coalmine Kingdom.
It wasn’t just happening on street corners, in libraries, in taverns, or at social gatherings. In a room within the royal palace of the capital, Minal—specifically, in the bedchamber of Crown Prince Gilliam—the Crown Princess Ierse whispered to her husband.
”Hey, hey, Gilliam! This one looks like it’d be fun, doesn’t it? An ‘Uterine Massager⁷‘ and even a ‘Nple Clamper⁸.’ If I get these, I wonder if you’ll discipline me from the very bottom of my belly…♡”
”U-umu. Just a little longer. If you can wait just a bit more, Canaria will fall into our hands. When that happens, we will summon the owner of that magic tool shop here…”
Gilliam was utterly overwhelmed by his wife, who hailed from a foreign land. She was lively, a far cry from the women of his own country. Imagining her—possessing such a unique allure within her healthy vitality—losing herself to pleasure, he reflexively gulped.
”But how many years will that take? If the war gets too intense, the shop people might just run away.”
”Soon! I’ll see to it that the war ends soon! I won’t make you wait for years!”
”Hmm, you don’t have to push yourself too hard, okay? It’s probably not that simple. I’m sorry for being selfish…”
”…!”
Ierse hadn’t been thinking deeply. She only wished to entertain her husband, whose face was always set in a grim mask and whose brow furrowed deeper as the war dragged on. Causing him distress was the last thing she wanted.
However, Gilliam was simple-hearted. He couldn’t stand the sight of his wife—who had looked so delighted a moment ago—suddenly wearing such a dejected expression.
At this time, had the relationship between the Crown Prince and his wife been cold, perhaps both the Coalmine Kingdom and the Canaria Kingdom would have been bled dry by this war and erased from the map. It was a historical tall tale, told half-jokingly by later generations.
”If only this war would end…”
That moment was drawing closer by the minute. The rumors continued to proliferate, and the heat of the fire crept ever closer. For example, even to the battlefront on the border, where those who wore themselves to the bone fighting for their nation remained.
—
Summary:
Rumors of Kento’s adult magic tools from ‘Harvest’ have spread across the Coalmine Kingdom, creating a massive underground demand among women. This fascination is morphing into anti-war sentiment as people realize the war prevents them from accessing these coveted goods. Even Crown Princess Ierse expresses interest, inadvertently motivating Crown Prince Gilliam to push for a swift end to the conflict to satisfy his wife’s curiosity.
—
Character Insight:
Gilliam’s character is revealed to be surprisingly devoted and simple-hearted; his military resolve is being steered not by cold strategy, but by a desire to see his wife smile. Ierse’s playful nature acts as a catalyst for potential peace, demonstrating the ‘butterfly effect’ where domestic intimacy influences national geopolitical stakes.
—
Behind the Scene:
The author cleverly uses the adult goods as a symbol of ‘liberation’ and ‘modernity’ that the conservative Coalmine Kingdom lacks, making the ‘fire’ of desire a more potent threat to the war effort than any actual weapon.
—
T/L:
Notes:
• Kento – The owner of the magic tool shop ‘Harvest,’ which discretely sells adult goods. He’s a former overworked, ordinary salaryman from modern Japan who was suddenly transported (isekai’d) to this fantasy world. He has dark hair and an unremarkable appearance, typically wearing a plain, slightly suspicious-looking shop owner’s clothes looks like Kazuma Satou from certain series. He has a minimal amount of magic power, enough to craft his specialty items.
• Gilliam – The Crown Prince of the Coalmine Kingdom. He is described as simple and naive, often overwhelmed by his lively wife’s energy. He is stressed by the ongoing war.
• Ierse – The Crown Princess and wife of Gilliam, originally from a foreign land. She is described as lively and healthy with a unique charm. She wants to cheer up her husband.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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