Chapter 470 Carley ①
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
”That’s a tempting offer, I’ll admit, but I believe I’ll pass. If it were just me, perhaps, but my ‘children’ don’t seem capable of putting up a fight.”
The Ancient Elf¹ customer – the one they called “Mother” – replied with surprising nonchalance. Or perhaps it wasn’t nonchalance at all. Her expression held a genuine trace of regret; it was clear that if her “Shadows” weren’t currently incapacitated, she would have been more than willing to test her luck against me.
”I appreciate that,” I said. “I’m not sure what the deal is, but I get the feeling killing you would be a massive headache for everyone involved.”
”Oh? So you truly believe you could kill me,” she said. “In that case, I suppose this strange ‘staff’ of yours isn’t even your final trump card.”
Mother declared this with what looked like genuine delight. Seriously, give me a break. This kind of high-stakes posturing isn’t supposed to be my job.
Still, what now? We avoided the worst-case scenario for the moment, but just because she says she’s not hostile doesn’t mean I can just untie her and send her on her way.
”So? You’re the ‘Mother’ everyone talks about, right?” I asked. “The mysterious Elf who’s been training a literal army of assassins in the Wielope Empire².”
”You’ve been misinformed on several counts,” she replied. “First, stop calling me ‘Mother.’ I’m not your mother, and despite how I look, I’ve never actually given birth.”
”Look, ‘how you look’ doesn’t mean anything – I can’t tell an Elf’s age to save my life,” I muttered. “Aside from the way you talk and the vibe you give off, you just look like a young human woman.”
”Oh my… I wonder how many centuries it’s been since a man tried to woo me like that,” she said.
”Wait, no! I’m not hitting on you! I’m just stating the obvious!”
”Heh heh heh. Is that so?”
I couldn’t tell how much of it was a joke, but she seemed to be enjoying herself. All while being crucified by the Spooky Ivy³ and having the Slime-Pal⁴ oozing all over her. I really wish she’d stop talking like that; it was making the whole situation look way more indecent than it needs to be.
”Just cut the act and tell me your name,” I said. “Otherwise, I’m going back to calling you ‘Mother.’”
”Well, I suppose that wouldn’t be entirely unpleasant, but… very well. My name is Carley.”
”Right, Ms. Carley. So, what can I do for you today?”
”As for my business, it is as I said,” Carley said. “I heard rumors of a man crafting fascinating magic circuits, and I simply had to see for myself. I also intended to thank you for looking after my ‘children’… though they’ve gone and ruined the gesture themselves.”
Carley spoke as if we were just having a casual chat, despite the fact that I was basically interrogating her like a detective in a cop drama. She glanced over at the Shadows who were currently wrapped like mummies in the Spooky Ivy.
”What helpless children you are,” she muttered, before turning back to me. “If you would be so kind, could you release this child… Gustav? He’s the leader of this lot; he should be able to explain the situation in more detail.”
She gestured with her chin toward the man I’d met back in the royal palace dungeon – the same guy who led the attack during the victory parade. As she pointed out, his mouth was currently gagged by the Spooky Ivy, making it impossible for him to speak.
And just to be clear, it’s not like the vines are being shoved inside his mouth, okay? Doing something like that to a guy wouldn’t be even remotely fun. Though, he is currently suspended in a full M-shaped leg spread.
”Ugh, controlling just a single vine is actually pretty tricky… Give me a second,” I said.
I pulled out the control pad hidden in my workbench. Usually, I leave the shop’s defenses on full auto, but I can manually override them with a bit of magic. Wait, wrong button. No, was it this one? Uh…
Every time I fumbled the controls, a chorus of “Ngh!?” and “Stop!?” and “Ugh!?” erupted from the Shadows as they were yanked into even more scandalous poses. These were the kinds of screams you definitely shouldn’t let kids hear.
Look, I wasn’t doing it on purpose! I swear! It just so happened that the vines dug into the women’s crotches, but the fact that they were digging into the men’s crotches just as hard is proof of my innocence! Though, I have no idea why the system is so damn good at targeting the crotch area…
”I assume you are taking this seriously?” Carley asked.
”I am! It’s actually hard! It’s like trying to untie a bunch of knots in a rope one by one using a pair of pliers!”
Under the pressure of her ominous threat, I finally managed to loosen the vines gagging the guy – Gustav. I know, the more I explain, the more suspicious it sounds, but it really was difficult!
”Okay, there we go. It hasn’t been that long, but good to see you again. So, your name is Gustav, huh?”
Gustav just stared back with a painfully awkward expression. He was probably trying to calculate exactly how much he could say without compromising the Wielope Empire.
”So, what’s your side of the story?” I asked.
”It appears the fault lies with us,” Gustav sighed.
”Well, if I’m believing Ms. Carley, it sounds like it,” I said. “How did this mess even start?”
”We were under the impression that ‘Mother’ had been kidnapped.”
”Come again?” I asked.
The word “kidnap” seemed so far removed from this Ancient Elf that I let out a dumbfounded noise, my eyes darting between Gustav and Carley. Gustav looked miserable; Carley looked like she didn’t have a care in the world.
”Allow me to explain,” Gustav said. “A few days ago, Carley-sama vanished from her chambers in the Imperial Capital.”
”Right. And?”
”This was an unprecedented crisis in the history of the Empire. Such a thing was unheard of,” Gustav said. “It was inconceivable that Carley-sama would leave the castle without a word to us. His Majesty the Emperor and the entire court were in an absolute panic, convinced the world was ending…”
”Isn’t that a bit dramatic? Everyone wants to go for a walk once in a while, don’t they?”
”If your own wife or child suddenly vanished into thin air, could you say the same?” Gustav asked.
”Well… when you put it like that… I guess not…”
I wasn’t sure if I was even supposed to be hearing stuff about the Emperor’s mental state, but one sharp glare from Gustav shut me up. It’s true – you can’t expect someone to stay calm when a precious family member goes missing. Which means for the Emperor and the entire Wielope Empire, this Ancient Elf is that important to them.
”We followed the faint traces of mana circuits⁵ and eventually tracked her to the Kingdom of Canaria,” Gustav continued. “Given the recent friction between our nations, we assumed this was retaliation. I hope you can understand why we jumped to that conclusion.”
”I mean, on a personal level, I can see where you’re coming from,” I said.
”We followed her scent as it grew stronger, leading us to this shop,” Gustav said. “My heart nearly stopped. We knew this was your shop, so I could only imagine how you’d managed to abduct ‘Mother’ and what kind of things you were doing to her. To make matters worse, the area was crawling with secret intelligence agents on high alert.”
”Oh…”
I’d almost forgotten. Our security isn’t just internal; the personal maids of the Queen of Canaria have been staked out around the shop ever since that attack from the Coalmine Kingdom. I wondered what happened to them…
”No need to worry,” Gustav said. “They’re right there, tied up just like us. We had to force our way past them, and they got caught in the crossfire when the shop’s defenses triggered.”
I looked over, and sure enough, there were the maids, tangled in the vines in equally compromising positions. Man, I didn’t notice them at all. That was a close one… if a real fight had broken out, they would’ve been the first casualties. I wanted to let them go immediately, but I needed to wrap this conversation up first.
”So, let me get this straight,” I said. “The whole reason this happened is because Ms. Carley decided to sneak out of the castle without telling anyone?”
”Objectively speaking, one could interpret it that way,” Gustav said, sweating bullets while pointedly refusing to look Carley in the eye. “It’s not that that did’t happen, but you could also say we were too hasty. There are… multiple perspectives, I suppose. A series of unfortunate misunderstandings…”
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Summary:
The mysterious ‘Mother’ is revealed to be an Ancient Elf named Carley who simply wandered away from the Wielope Empire out of curiosity. Her disappearance caused a national panic, leading Gustav and his assassins to track her to the protagonist’s shop, thinking she was kidnapped. The chapter ends with the revelation that even the Queen’s secret security maids were caught in the shop’s automatic erotic traps during the chaos.
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Trivia:
- Carley has never actually given birth despite the title ‘Mother’.
- The shop’s security system is so effective it neutralized both the Empire’s top assassins and the Kingdom’s secret maids simultaneously.
- Gustav has been caught and humiliated by the protagonist multiple times now.
- The protagonist was manually fumbling the controls, causing the ‘accidental’ erotic poses and screams
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Character Insight:
Carley shows a playful, almost flirtatious side toward the protagonist, suggesting she is bored with her high status. Gustav’s motive is purely protective/paternal toward Carley, showing the high esteem she is held in by the Empire.
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Behind the Scenes:
The author uses the trope of the ‘all-powerful but airheaded ancient being’ to bridge the political gap between the two nations through a comedic misunderstanding.
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TL Notes:
Notes:
• Carley – Ancient Elf ‘Mother’ leading Wielope Empire assassins—young human looks with ancient aura, long green hair, carefree villain vibe calling Emperor ‘Dee-bou.’ Never birthed but matriarch figure, grants Forest Blessing, stays chill even tentacle/slime-trapped.
• Gustav – Leader of the Wielope Empire’s elite ‘Shadow’ assassin crew—captured in royal dungeon & victory parade hit, now snagged by shop defenses. Die-hard Emperor loyalist, shakes at the thought of Carley getting hurt from political fallout.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
Thanks for reading.
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