Chapter 73 A Divine Blessing for the Tremble-Ddo-Buddy
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
The Kingdom of Canaria, the Royal Capital Canarias, Canarias Cathedral. The public trial held there—commonly known as the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” defense trial against its designation as a Forbidden Tool—was rapidly approaching its conclusion.
I had just finished answering the ‘amateur questions’ posed by Professor Soy of the Agire Seminary, and the decision to resume sales of the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” was about to be officially declared.
That was when Cardinal Mork objected, halting the proceedings, but then a mysterious woman immediately countered his argument…. Both I and the audience who had gathered for the day could do nothing but watch, completely dumbfounded by her statement.
”Like, for real, I don’t think it’s a dangerous tool or anything~¹.”
Her tone was incredibly flippant. The “Ddo-Buddy Trial” had been conducted seriously, despite the inherently ridiculous premise, but that atmosphere was utterly destroyed in an instant. Cardinal Mork, whom I internally called ‘Mork-san’, raised his voice, looking panicked.
”Sto—! R-Rovarlors-dono, you mustn’t! Absolutely mustn’t do that!”
”Aww, Mork-san’s ‘mustn’t’ came out again~…” Rovarlors, the woman hiding her face as an “Inquisitor,” muttered with an air of weariness as she stepped forward. She walked right up to my immediate vicinity, to the witness stand, and casually grabbed the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” with a firm, unconcerned hand.
”Haha! It’s really shaking!”
”Ah! No, please, stop! You mustn’t touch such a thing! Ahh!?” Mork-san, the Cardinal, tried to chase after her, but the downside of sitting in the most important-looking position was that he slammed his foot right into the corner of the pulpit. It made a seriously loud noise—was he going to be okay?
”Wow, that’s amazing! This has gotta feel so good, for sure!”
Without an ounce of concern for the pathetic Mork-san, the woman was fondling and stroking the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy.”
She wore the typical high-class priest’s attire, the so-called clerical robes, which, unlike the Sisters’ habits, concealed the lines of her body. Furthermore, a veil completely hid her face and hair, making her appearance a total mystery.
However, the way her body was sinuously wiggling and the sensual way her hand was tracing the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” made me realize that this person—no, this woman—was definitely an erotic one.
”Hey, big brother, can I keep this? Lately, my ‘training’ hasn’t been exciting enough, you know? All the Ddo-Buddies I have are weak and pathetic, and it’s been a drag~².”
I flinched internally when she addressed me but managed to answer, “Um, I didn’t prepare that, so please ask the church official in charge.”
Given that Mork-san was sputtering, “Sto—!” and Her Majesty the Queen had previously told me to “be careful” and “under no circumstances insult her,” I knew for a fact that she was that kind of person. She was someone I truly shouldn’t be speaking to so casually; one wrong move and I’d be the one put on trial.
I swallowed all the questions I had—Why are you here? Is it okay to be that casual? Are you a ‘gal’ or a ‘bratty-woman’?—and clamped my mouth shut.
”Oh, is that right~? Well, then, Trantestar-san, can I have this?”
”Yes, please. Feel free to take it with you,” the Archbishop granted, appearing to take it all in stride.
”Yay! Cecile-chan is such a cheapskate she wouldn’t give it to me. I’m going to try it out tonight right away~³.”
See! Not only did she call Archbishop Trantestar “Trantestar-san,” but “Cecile-chan” must be Queen Cecile’s Majesty, right? I did my best to avoid making eye contact with this Rovarlors-person, waiting for the storm to pass.
But it seemed the wholesaler wasn’t in the business of letting me off the hook. She sandwiched the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” between her breasts, enjoying its vibration, and then stared intently at my face while questioning me. Though I couldn’t discern her gaze through the veil, I had the distinct feeling I was being scrutinized.
”Your name is Kento, right? Which do you prefer: Ken-chan or Ken-kun? Oh, and you can call me Rova-chan or Rose-chan—whatever you like!”
Her voice, completely unconcerned, came from beyond the veil that fully covered her face. What in the world is this free-spirited person? Cardinal Mork was glaring at me from where he lay sprawled on the floor. I had a bad feeling that no matter how I answered, it wouldn’t end well. But ignoring her felt like an even worse idea.
”Ah, please call me whatever you like, Rovarlors-san…? Rovarlors-sama…?”
”Heeey, what’s with the bad vibe, Kento-cchi~!” she whined.
Didn’t you just ask if it was ‘Ken-chan’ or ‘Ken-kun’?! I thought, though of course, I didn’t dare say it aloud. Better to leave sleeping gods alone. I averted my gaze from her and looked toward Archbishop Trantestar, the facilitator, pleading for help with my eyes.
He responded with a sigh of ‘give me a break’ that would make the classic light novel protagonist pale, and he addressed Rovarlors-dono.
”Rovarlors-dono, the trial is technically still in session. We must first pronounce the verdict.”
”Ah, yeah, you’re right~. In that case, let’s just hurry up and finish this,” Rovarlors replied to the Archbishop in her consistently light tone. Honestly, I should have been waiting for the verdict with my heart pounding, but all the tension was completely gone.
That’s what I thought. That’s what I believed, but then, the atmosphere surrounding Rovarlors shifted completely. Even though her form was entirely obscured by the clerical robes and veil, every single person present could feel it: a sacred, pure, and overwhelming presence.
She knelt between the witness stand and the pulpit, right in front of the stained glass window depicting the progenitor of the “Church of Demon-Subjugation,” and held the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” aloft like an offering. The light pouring in illuminated her, and glittering motes of light danced in the air.
”Woah…!”
”Ohh…!”
Gasps of awe escaped the audience, who should have been relaxed or dumbfounded just moments before. It was an undeniable, overwhelming presence. I see. This is why people worship her, I thought.
All the surrounding “Inquisitors” followed suit and offered a silent prayer. Even Cardinal Mork, who was still sprawled on the floor and looked like he still wanted to protest, now clutched his injured foot, closed his eyes, and pressed his hands together in prayer.
”In the name of the Great God, I, Rovarlors, shall grant my recognition….”
Her voice, the same as before, now rang out clear, pure, and heavy. A power derived from what must be a “Divine Miracle” overflowed from her body, and she herself began to emit a faint glow.
I involuntarily fell to my knees and bowed my head. No one told me to. I hadn’t suddenly found faith. But my body moved on its own, instinctively knowing that I had to.
”This item is not a threat to humanity. It is a testament to the noble path that contributes to the peace and development of mankind…”
The cool, clear voice resonated again. I snuck a glance, and this time, the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” was glowing. The word “Sanctification” flashed through my mind.
Hey, is this okay?! Is this okay in so many different ways?!
I waited for Rovarlors’s voice, panicking internally. It didn’t seem like someone like me could interrupt the proceedings.
”I hereby declare. This ‘Tremble-Ddo-Buddy’ is not an evil thing. Henceforth, it is forbidden to call this item by the wicked name ‘Demon’s Rod’ or any similar designation.”
The “Inquisitors” bowed their heads even deeper. Cardinal Mork no longer even held his foot, silently accepting her declaration. Rovarlors uttered the closing words of the ritual.
”May the grace of God be upon us. May we be granted the mind and body to strike down the ‘Malignancy’….”
It was a prayer that must have been desperately earnest at some point in the past. The people gathered in the Cathedral, regardless of their piety or social standing, offered that prayer together. A period of silence ensued, where no one raised their head or spoke a word.
After a while, Rovarlors slowly rose to her feet.
”Okay! Well then, I’ll leave the rest to you all! And Kento-pippi, see you later~!”
Returning to her strangely light tone, she departed, clutching the “Tremble-Ddo-Buddy” firmly. The tsukkomi that ‘Weren’t you calling me Kento-cchi just a second ago?’ was, of course, something I couldn’t bring myself to say.
—
Summary:
The Ddo-Buddy trial was practically over when the free-spirited Inquisitor Rovarlors crashed the party. She was immediately obsessed with the Tremble-Buddy, treating the entire sacred court like a shopping trip. The Cardinal was furious, the Archbishop was resigned, and Kento was utterly terrified. But in a sudden, dramatic moment, Rovarlors performed a powerful divine ritual, declaring the sex toy a holy item contributing to ‘human development’ and forbidding its slander. She then just casually walked off with the now-sanctified item and gave Kento a silly nickname. The trial ended not with a verdict, but with a bizarre act of divine endorsement.
—
Character Insight:
Kento’s anxiety continues to be the central theme, showing his inability to deal with the overwhelming power and casual chaos of this world’s high-ranking officials. Rovarlors is revealed to be incredibly powerful—capable of instantly flipping the tone of a sacred ceremony and bending its rules for her personal, carnal interests. Her casualness about the Queen’s name and her power is a clear signal of her supreme authority.
—
Behind the Scene:
The name ‘Cecile-chan’ (セッちゃん) is a very casual, almost diminutive way to address someone, which is highly inappropriate for a Queen. This is a subtle clue that Rovarlors is either equal to or has a deeply intimate relationship with the Queen, further establishing her immense authority and boundary-pushing nature. The ‘Sanctification’ is a narrative device to make the forbidden item an ‘official’ holy item, permanently ending the threat of it being banned by the church, at least by the traditional process.
—
T/L:
¹ The original line ends with a casual, drawling waa~, which emphasizes the speaker’s extreme lack of concern for the solemnity of the court. ↩
² The word shugyō (修行) means ‘training’ or ‘ascetic practice’ but, given the context, is a clear euphemism for her sexual activity or seeking pleasure, playing on her status as a clergy member. ↩
³ ‘Cecile-chan’ (Sec-chan in the original, using a shortened version of Cecile) is an incredibly familiar and borderline disrespectful way to address the Queen, highlighting Rovarlors’s total disregard for social hierarchy. ↩
Notes:
• Mork – A central figure in the ‘Inquisition.’ Acts panicked and constantly looks sideways, seemingly pressured by the masked Inquisitor. He represents the rigid, fear-based opposition to the protagonist’s products.
• Rovarlors – A mysterious Inquisitor of the church’s highest ranks, concealed in high-quality veiled vestments that hide her face and hair. Her light, bratty demeanor and erotically suggestive presence sharply contrast her sacred role, while her true identity and immense power—enough to unsettle Cardinals and Archbishops—remain secret, along with her fondness for powerful pleasure tools.
• Trantestar – The middle-aged man Archbishop of Canarias and the initiator of the current trial. He is an alleged ally of Kento but remains suspiciously neutral.
• Cecile – A high-ranking, powerful woman in the capital who possesses the authority to regulate business and commerce, particularly concerning moral or public order issues. She is currently investigating Kento’s shop, ‘Harvest.’ Have long golden hair, elegant, and wearing expensive white dress with gold accesories.
• Kento – The owner of the magic tool shop ‘Harvest,’ which discretely sells adult goods. He’s a former overworked, ordinary salaryman from modern Japan who was suddenly transported (isekai’d) to this fantasy world. He has dark hair and an unremarkable appearance, typically wearing a plain, slightly suspicious-looking shop owner’s clothes looks like Kazuma Satou from certain series. He has a minimal amount of magic power, enough to craft his specialty items.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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