Volume 1 Chapter 19 Kansai Disturbance Night VI – Great Youkai Cleanup
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
”Thanks for your hard work, Naoshi-dono. Here you go.”
”Ah, thanks… whoops.”
Naoshi, looking exhausted, reached for the water bottle that Sasara offered but missed and dropped it on the ground.
His long fingers hung weakly, and his arm trembled slightly.
”Haha, sorry ‘bout bein’ so clumsy.”
”No, it’s fine. I should have been more considerate.”
After such a fierce battle, especially grappling with an oni, there was no way he had any energy left. Sasara picked up the bottle, wiped the mouth carefully, and opened the cap.
”Here, drink up.”
”Well, then, I’ll take ya up on that.”
Naoshi, clearly too tired to put on a brave face, tilted his chin up and took a sip from the offered bottle.
After 2 or 3 sips, he signaled with his eyes, swished the water in his mouth, and spat it out.
Small white pieces mixed with the faintly red water rolled onto the ground.
”Ouch… Ah, looks like I chipped a tooth.”
”Excuse me──your right eye is quite swollen. You should get it checked later. Also, it seems your right ear needs stitches.”
”I’ll leave it to ya. If possible, I’d rather have someone skilled and experienced.”
”Then, if you don’t mind, I’ll wash the wound first. It might sting.”
”Okay, okay… Ahh! That hurts!!”
”I’ll use technique to numb the pain while I stitch, so please stay still.”
”Ah, please be gentle… But if this mess makes me less handsome, what am I gonna do? Is my nose lookin’ lower? If I get scars on my forehead and ears, girls won’t like me, right?”
”What are you worried about? Honestly, we’re surprised that you’re okay after everything. You looked completely unconscious at one point.”
”Ah, I didn’t do nothin’ special. Even when I’m out cold, I just keep my spirit power flowin’ to protect myself.”
”I think that’s pretty special…”
”It was necessary. I’m not very skilled, and with my fightin’ style, accidents like today are bound to happen.”
Naoshi said it casually, but one had to wonder how much effort and sacrifice he had made to achieve that.
”Well, thanks to that, now I can stop a 9-millimeter full metal jacket bullet with just my body, even while sleeping. Pretty amazing, right?”
”Did ya test that?”
”I got yelled at by my family for doing it in the house.”
”Unbelievable. That makes sense.”
Naoshi laughed cheerfully, but Sasara wondered what kind of reckless person would take on such a challenge.
What would happen if something went wrong with the head of the household? Just then, one of the team members, busy with various cleanup tasks, called out.
”Acting head Kazuramichi-dono. I’ve completed the reports and confirmations. Midosuji is indeed experiencing some confusion, but both the Kazuramichi and Shiun families have no serious injuries, and everything else has been taken care of.”
”Oh, got it. Thanks for the update. What about the damage elsewhere?”
”Several people are seriously injured in Otsu, which suffered the most damage. In Rokko, the Touin and Kanbe families successfully sealed the Great Youkai before it appeared and drove it away. However, the first-class Kanbe Yuzura-sama collapsed afterward──likely due to some kind of curse. Yoshino is also fine. There are some minor injuries everywhere, but there are reportedly no deaths.”
”…”
Naoshi showed a slight reaction in 2 places: the damage in Otsu and the incident in Hyogo.
During the former, he emitted a somewhat displeased aura, which both the reporting exorcist and Sasara noticed but chose not to mention.
”It’s fortunate that there are no deaths.”
”Yeah, it was a helluva night, but it turned out better than it coulda, that’s for sure.”
”Did you have a friendship with Yuzura-dono?”
”Yeah, we go way back—been friends since we were kids. He’s a steady guy, unlike Itsuki, so I figured he wouldn’t mess up too easy. But, hearin’ he’s safe, I can finally let my guard down a bit.”
”Even Naoshi-dono felt the pressure, huh?”
”Course I was. I made a big deal ‘bout comin’ out here, so if I’d lost, they’d never let me hear the end of it. Honestly, right now, all I wanna do is be spoiled by a pretty woman and sleep till noon.”
”If it’s okay with you, I can lend you my lap.”
”Ah, that’s temptin’, but I’ll have to pass. Sasara-san, you’ve probably got plenty to do yourself.”
”Oh, are you dissatisfied with an older woman’s lap?”
”Nah, I’m actually into older women! But relaxin’ on another man’s wife? I’d rather not play with fire, thanks.”
As Naoshi spoke, a simple silver ring shone on the left hand’s ring finger of the Rat Team leader, who hid their identity and face with a mask and black clothing.
”You’re observant… The stitching is done. I’ll put a healing seal on it, but it’s just first aid; please have a practitioner check it as well.”
”Thanks a bunch. Man, if I hadn’t noticed that, I’da kept my mouth shut… Married women are seriously scary.”
”I have no intention beyond wanting to show my appreciation.”
”Sure, sure. By the way, anyone got a small knife? And a metal file?”
”I have a small knife, but… Naoshi-dono, what for?”
”Obvious, ain’t it? Now that my strength’s back, I’m gonna carve up this broken oni horn—gonna be shovin’ it somewhere appropriate real soon.”
Saying this, Naoshi twirled the broken oni horn and then forcefully slapped Kurikoma, who was sitting as her chair, on the backside.
A loud, dry sound echoed, but the unconscious oni didn’t move at all.
From her curled-up position in a bowing stance, faint white smoke still rose, giving off a burnt smell.
”Did you really mean that──.”
While Sasara said this in disbelief, the team members were more anxious.
They had their own reasons that made it hard to hold back their voices against the Acting Head of the Family from another house.
”Kazuramichi-dono, this oni horn has such power. There are many other uses for it; it’s just too much…”
”That’s right. Even as it is, it could become a family treasure for a hundred or a thousand years!? Please reconsider!”
”What? Y’all really think this bitch’s horns are worth so much? Naw, these things are better suited for diggin’ into her filthy hole.”
”Indeed…”
”That’s rather vulgar. I understand your anger, though.”
However, no one could utter any more words in the face of Naoshi’s quietly angry aura.
He accepted the small knife that was offered to him as if it were being snatched away and immediately began to trim the horns with a light sound. His gaze during the work was sharp, as if he were looking at an enemy.
The horn, which was about fifteen centimeters (6in) long and curved gently, soon changed its shape into something lewd.
”Aaahhh…”
”What a waste…!”
”How much would the horn of a Great Youkai oni be worth…?”
Those who could not hold back their disappointment voiced their lamentations.
But no one could stop Naoshi, who was now immersed in his work, cursing under his breath. After all, it was a war trophy he had won on his own.
Soon, Naoshi raised the oni horn, now transformed into something else, with a satisfied voice.
”Well, it’s done. Whaddaya think?”
”It’s a masterpiece that would constitute sexual harassment just by showing it to a woman.”
As Sasara said, the protruding gills at the tip, the structure with narrow roots and spherical joints from there, and the handle left in the shape of a “T” to make it easier to insert and prevent it from being fully inserted──it was clearly a fine an*l vibrator.
The original copper color, which matched its intended use, was also quite unfortunate.
”Well, let’s get her up. I’m curious ‘bout what kinda face she’ll make.”
”Naoshi-dono…”
Naoshi poured the remaining water from a bottle onto Kurikoma’s head with a cheerful voice. Someone exclaimed, “Uwaa,” in a slightly withdrawn tone.
”U, uh…”
”Hey, get up.”
”Wha, what…? What about my horn──!?”
Kurikoma, who was still being ridden by Naoshi, first checked the safety of her right horn as she awoke.
”It’s… there…”
After exhaling a sigh of relief, she immediately put her hand on her butt.
She then confirmed that there were no abnormalities in the rich curves of her buttocks, which were still wrapped in jeans, and finally, she let out a deep sigh of relief.
”Haaaaa…”
Then, with trepidation, she turned around to look at the person sitting on her rolled-up back.
”──Did you spare my life?”
Several people who knew the fate that awaited her looked away, unable to bear witnessing it.
It was clear that ayakashi had no mercy, and no one would object if they were simply killed.
But if they were to be tormented on purpose, that was a different story.
Especially when the hobby was so bad.
”Well, killin’ ya’d be boring if it just made your pals come after me for revenge. And if I wanna use ya as a warnin’, it’s way more convenient to keep ya alive.”
”Indeed. But if that’s the case, you could have just taken the horns without leaving any, right? Thank you, thank you. I was so worried about what terrible things would be done to me──oh, oh, I’m glad, I’m so glad…”
As the oni began to shed tears, the remaining Ayabe crowd, who had been holding back their emotions, could no longer bear it and turned away.
Some of them even covered their mouths with their hands, overcome with pity.
Even exorcists have some compassion.
”Yes As I said earlier, would you please make me your shiki-oni? I did not say that lightly. I want to apologize for the trouble I caused and show my gratitude for sparing my life.”
”Oh, hold on now—way too early for you to be sayin’ thanks.”
”Wha──?”
But there was one exception.
”The cruel stuff’s still comin’, ya hear? As for that contract oni, I’ll think about it later—if ya still wanna show yer gratitude by then.”
Naoshi smiled and thrust the transformed horn, now an an*l vibrator, into Kurikoma’s face.
He waved it in front of her eyes, like a cat toy.
”Wh, what…? Th, this…? Wha, what is this──?”
Confusion spread across the oni’s face, followed by a gradual understanding, and then despair once again enveloped her.
”Khyu.”
Kurikoma, who seemed to have reached her limit, lost consciousness again, emitting a strange breathing sound.
Her face, which had fallen to the ground without any defense, made a dull thud.
”Tsk. She passed out, huh… How boring—well, don’t matter. I’ll make her take her clothes off, kneel down, an’ then shove it up her ass. Anyone got a camera to snap a pic?”
”Naoshi-dono, that’s really too much…!”
”Please stop, it also concerns the honor of your family──!”
”Don’t you have any heart?”
”Eh? Why…? Why I gotta take the blame…?”
The Ayabe crowd of women finally stepped in when Naoshi mercilessly pulled down Kurikoma’s jeans, exposing half of her butt.
They managed to convince him with great difficulty, and the oni’s dignity was barely preserved.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
Thanks for reading.