Volume 11 Chapter 3 Santa Claus Life Day 2
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
Having come to Aichi Prefecture for Beryl’s Christmas campaign, I rode in the location bus prepared by the staff who had arrived the previous day, after eating hitsumabushi at the airport. We headed to our destination, Toyota City.
”Aqua-san, it’s time to turn on the camera.”
”Yes!”
Yesterday, Ako-san accompanied me, but today my partner is Kotono. Kotono used to be Toa’s exclusive manager, but now she holds the positions of Toa’s manager and supervising manager. Because of that, when Ako-san can’t accompany me, I’m usually with Kotono or Shitori-oneechan. As a replacement, I heard that a new member, Aika-chan, is accompanying Toa.
Ako-san and Kotono highly appreciate her, and the popular Aika-chan, who has a good reputation among me and everyone else, has passed the audition for the AQUARIUM she is currently doing and has been decided to be the manager of someone. I’m a little worried about how things are going over there, but for now, I’ll focus on what I have to do.
”Well then, Aqua-san, this is a letter from the campaign winner.”
”Yes!”
I, who received a letter from Kotono, read it into the camera.
”Um… Actually, I wrote this letter to request Shirogane Aqua-san. I am a teacher at a middle and high school in Toyota City. On December 25th, the students from our school’s junior and high school divisions, in collaboration with local community members, plan to interact with the children at the local foster care facility and the elderly residents in the nursing home through a Christmas party. If you’d like, could you surprise them by appearing at the event? I applied, hoping it would be a reward for the hardworking students… I see. Sounds good, right? Well then, shall we go?”
”Yes. Well then, before that, I want Aqua-san to change into this costume.”
”Huh? Th-this is…!”
I received a bag containing the costume from Kotono and, looking at the costume and script inside, I understood. I see, so that’s how it is.
”Understood. Leave it to me!”
And after a while, we arrived at the destination, which is the school. It seems that they are holding a Christmas event in the cafeteria here. All the staff members got off the location bus, and I changed into the costume handed to me. I was a bit worried that the handed costume might be a miniskirt Santa outfit, but this is fine. I’m used to it, and it suits me well.
”Perfect…! With this, you can appeal to safety and suppress any unruly behavior. It’s killing two birds with one stone.”
”Safety? Unruly behavior?”
”Oh, no, it’s nothing. Ahem… it’s about this. Well then, shall we go?”
”Yes!”
While holding down the Santa Claus hat on my head to keep it from falling, I make my way to the cafeteria where the event is taking place.
”They’re doing it, huh?”
Hoping someone would notice, I peek into the cafeteria from the entrance. I could just go in suddenly… Oh! I made eye contact with a girl wearing a school uniform.
As I waved to the girl, she stared at me as if frozen. How cute. Is she in middle school? The twintails remind me of my beloved sister Lapis. Oh… I’m starting to worry about whether my Lapis is getting along well with the others at the training camp.
”Eh?”
I sent various hand signals to her, and another girl noticed me and whispered softly. Because of that, people who noticed the strangeness turned their gaze toward us one after another. Alright, the timing is perfect. I stop hiding and walk towards where everyone is.
”Kyaaaaa!”
”H-Heaven’s Sword!!”
”No way!”
”Eh… Is it from some kind of hero show?”
”Whoaaaa… Heaven Sword, Kenzaki… alive…!”
”Eh? Eh? Eh? I-Is it real?”
”No, no, it can’t be a real one, right?”
”A real one wouldn’t come here, right?”
Wearing the Heaven’s Sword suit, I raised my hand in response to the cheers without saying a word. Surely, they wouldn’t think the real deal had shown up.
”Good morning, everyone! This is Chubu TV.”
The staff member accompanying me in my place explained false information to everyone. She diverted attention by stating we were filming for the local evening news, but in reality, we were doing it for this event.
The staffs had actually gone to the trouble of enlisting the help of a local TV personality just for this purpose. By the way, it seems Kotono is well-known among fans. To prevent my true identity from being revealed, she’s waiting in the location bus, watching the footage.
”Today, as a surprise gift from the school’s teachers to liven up the Christmas party, we’ve invited Heaven’s Sword here for everyone and the students!”
After the staff’s words, I struck an iconic pose to warm up the crowd.
”Wow, it’s the pose! Looks so real!”
”Yeah! Looks like the real deal!”
”The person inside is amazing at imitation!”
”The perfect copy of ‘My mom said’ is incredible.”
”This is quite something; I think this person has practiced ‘My mom said’ a lot.”
”Ah, this is from episode 7 of ‘My mom said’. I understand.”
”This earns Kenzaki a lot of points.”
”Ah, ah, ah, Kenzaki wasn’t dead after all! Sneaky…”
It’s not just an imitation, but the real deal.
Also, what is this ‘My mom said’ practice!? Wasn’t ‘My mom said’ different in each episode of the 7th story!?
With a strong spirit of service, I learned from Tenga-senpai and decided on the coolest pose I could think of for Kenzaki.
”Was there a pose like this?”
”No… I don’t think there was.”
”Isn’t it Kamishiro? Something like that.”
”A cool Kenzaki would never make that pose.”
”Big sister… I appreciate you trying various things, but let’s stick to Heaven’s Sword, okay?”
”Maybe she usually does Poison Chalice in the hero show.”
“If this was Butterfly Mask’s pose, it would have been so much better…”
“That just earned negative Kenzaki points.”
“Uh, uh, uh… Kenzaki is, after all… sniff, sob!”
Huh? This reaction wasn’t what I expected… Hey, crying girl, are you okay? Are you emotionally unstable? I want to hug and comfort you, but would it be too obvious if I did?
“Eep?!”
I approach the crying girl, embrace her, and gently stroke her head. Even though she’s crying right in front of me, the option not to do it for fear of being discovered doesn’t exist within me. My name is Shirogane Aqua. I’m the type to charge through doors rather than knocking on them, and to push instead of pulling.
“Uh, I’m jealous…”
“I don’t mind if it’s a fake. Or even a girl. Please marry me.”
“Kenzaki points just shot up!!”
“Huh…? Th-this is real…”
“No way, this can’t be real.”
”Even if you don’t look closely, she’s tall, and her physique is good, huh?”
”Wait. Just now, when we passed each other, there was a really nice smell…”
”Awawawawa, th-this well-defined enchanting hip line…!”
”Do superhero show suits look this realistic now?”
Uh-oh, I might get caught if I get too carried away.
Seeing the girl stop crying, I moved away and signaled to the staff remaining at the entrance.
’Is there, a man? Is there, a man here?’
Chijou’s voice flowed through the cafeteria speakers.
In response, ordinary Chijou appeared in the cafeteria.
”Wowwwww!”
”Kyaaaaaa!”
”It’s a superhero show! The superhero show has started!”
”Hush! At times like this, act like a regular citizen with the feelings of the characters in the work, and play the role of a regular citizen honestly!”
”Help me, Heaven’s Sword!”
”It’s time to ask for help!”
”I’ll participate with the feeling of becoming SYUKUJYO!”
”Do your best, Kenzaki-oniisan!”
Ah, yeah. Somehow, the vibe is really good, and I was a bit surprised, but if they’re enjoying it, I’m honestly happy.
’Chijou! Are you planning to interfere with everyone’s Christmas by appearing in a place like this!’
My voice echoes through the cafeteria speakers.
It’s the audio I provided to accompany the December hero show.
’Heaven’s Sword! You’re, in the way!!’
The speaker plays the opening theme song “next round” from the first season.
In sync with it, I spontaneously showcase a splendid action scene with Chijou.
Wow. Everyone assured me they were pros and to trust them, but Chijou’s folks move in sync with my actions. It seems like I can make it even more flashy.
”Whoa…”
”Huh? Wait, isn’t this hero show amazing right now?”
”The action is so intense; I’m shaking.”
”No, no, no, clearly, this isn’t the quality of a hero show, right!?”
”Kenzaki, do your best!”
”Sure, this Heaven’s Sword will do. Please marry me.”
”Huh? Huh? Huh? Could this possibly be…”
In time with the end of the music, I somersaulted and made a splendid landing.
Everyone gave me a big round of applause.
But the impromptu hero show doesn’t end here.
’As expected, it’s the, Heaven’s Sword!’
Once again, Chijou with a familiar design emerges from the entrance.
Deka-onna… it’s been a while.
Come to think of it, I fought Deka-onna when I helped with the hero show before. Maybe she’s popular?
’This won’t end, like this!!’
Following Deka-onna’s command, the risen Chijou and others take everyone in the cafeteria hostage.
”Here it comessss!”
”Recent hero shows are really amazing…”
”Wait, did I become the heroine!?”
”In the morning, we all watched Heaven’s Sword together, and now we’re taken hostage in a hero show. This is the best!”
”Praise, praise… Thanks for the good memories as a souvenir from the underworld.”
”Help meee! Kenzaki-oniisan!”
Is it just my imagination, or do the girls seem happy being taken hostage? Let’s just say it’s my imagination.
’You’re coward. Deka-onna!’
’I don’t, care! Now! If you want me, to release the hostage, you must reveal, your identity.!’
’…Fine. In exchange, when I reveal my true identity, release the hostage and face me fair and square in battle!’
Saying that, I slowly lift the helmet that was covering my head.
”Huh? Huh?”
”Wait. Hey, wait a minute!!”
”Ah, ah, ah…”
”No way… right?”
Taking off the helmet, I hand it to the staff member who comes out from the side. This suit is not borrowed for a hero show; it’s the real deal. So if I drop the helmet on the floor, there’s a possibility the protrusions might get damaged.
Considering Director Hongou would probably cry if I broke it, I’ll handle this delicately.
”Ugyaaaaaa!”
”Gwaaaaaa!”
”It’s the real deal!”
”Thank you. Thank you.”
”Let’s bow for now…”
”The best Christmas present ever!”
”Huh? Huh? Isn’t live Kenzaki amazing?”
”Wait, he’s unbelievably cool in real life. If I see something like this, I can’t go back to the Kenzaki on the TV…”
”That action was really performed by the person himself.”
”The face is small! The real one is amazing…”
”Clearly, that hip line is genuine. Yes, I knew it from the beginning. The eyes of this butt sommelier don’t deceive.”
”The quality of the suit was obviously different. Yes, as a Driver geek, I noticed.”
To those who knew but kept quiet, thank you.
But what on earth is a butt sommelier? I can understand if it’s a vegetable sommelier, but it seems clearly different from that.
By the way, Kaede mentioned having a sommelier qualification, but I wonder what kind of sommelier it is. I should ask next time!
”Deka-onna… If you still have regrets, let’s cut off those regrets here.”
Now, the new opening song that has been used from today is playing. While showing off flashy action scenes again, I’ll also insert some live singing with the microphone handed to me hastily. Finally, I’ll embrace Deka-onna and finish.
”Huh?”
The moment I embraced Deka-onna, I felt a sense of déjà vu from the large breasts hidden inside the suit. Even though it’s through the suit, I know the feel of these breasts.
No way, is Kotono inside!? She said she was watching from outside, but this is a bit surprising.
”My mom said… No, it’s Kenzaki Souji’s declaration. I’ll wrap up all of your complexes in my love and show you.”
Huh? Deka-onna suddenly seemed to slump down.
Are you okay, Kotono? I feel like steam is coming out of your head, or maybe it’s just my imagination?
”Um, about the inside of Deka-onna…”
”Yes, Big Sis is dead. She’s definitely dead now.”
”Big Sis, praise, praise.”
”Big Sis has been rewarded. Congratulations. If this were Hoge or Hage, I’d throw them a PET bottle.”
”Ah, ah, ah, I understand because I’m also 178cm. Those words just now are definitely killer lines.”
”I also have a big body, and I’ve been ridiculed by men since I was young… I see. It would have been nice to find someone who loves this body as it is. Thank you…”
”I wish Kenzaki would marry all of the volunteers already. I don’t ask for cohabitation or wanting children, so just having the fact of being married on paper is enough to live by.”
Well, the surprise seems to have worked. After confirming Kotono’s revival, I stood up and greeted everyone again. Then, I handed out Christmas presents, shook hands, signed autographs, and took photos together.
”Thank you all so much! No, thank you. Sensei, it’s great that everyone enjoyed it.”
After thanking the teacher who was the client, I boarded the location bus and headed to the next scene.
”Yes, then the next letter is here… Um, nice to meet you. Actually, on December 25th, local people gather for an annual amateur baseball tournament. Our team has been losing to the Rival team for 13 years, and we’ve never won. If it’s okay, could you come and support us a bit? I see.”
Come to think of it, I remember playing baseball in the first episode of Yuu-onii. I was surprised to hit a home run even myself at that time. I think the wind must have been on my side.
”Well then, shall we go?”
”Yes!”
As soon as we arrived at the destination in no time, I put on a hoodie jacket from above and stealthily approached the baseball ground where a game was taking place, trying not to be noticed.
Oh!
Looking at the score, it was 6-3 in the bottom of the 9th inning, 2 outs, runners on 1st and 2nd. If I could hit a long ball here, it would be a chance to tie the game. Since people around were focused on the game, it seemed that no one noticed me.
Thanks to that, I was able to approach the ground without being caught. But it’s already the bottom of the 9th inning, it got closer to the wire than I thought. If I were a bit later, I’m sure I wouldn’t have made it in time.
”Kyaaaa!”
”We did it!”
Ah, they hit it. Unfortunately, due to the fine play of the opposing team, it turned into a single hit, but still, the bases are loaded. It’s getting intense! I turn my gaze towards the bench where they sent me a letter, but many people were gathered there.
What’s wrong? I approach the bench to confirm what’s happening, leaning in to listen.
”Ugh… even though we have came all the way.”
”Captain, it’s already at the limit! Please don’t push yourself.”
”I’m sorry for the defense earlier.”
”Don’t apologize! Thanks to the captain’s fine play, we’re only three points behind!”
I see, the next batter is the captain, but it seems she got injured during the previous play on the field. At a glance, it’s clear that her little finger is bent in an awkward direction. Frankly, no matter how you look at it, continuing the play is impossible. Sensing the discomfort in the bench, the umpire (referee) approaches.
”Excuse me. Are you okay? If it’s too difficult, you can end it by forfeit… or you can send in a pinch hitter. It’s really not allowed, but we don’t want the other team to finish like this. If there’s anyone here, your friend or someone watching the game, who seems capable of batting, we’re asking if they can stand in as a substitute. Does anyone know someone who could fill in?”
Everyone looks at each other.
They seem to be pondering what to do.
”Hey, does anyone know?”
”My daughter is only 3 years old, so it’s impossible…”
”My mom just hurt her back yesterday, so…”
”If it’s Grandma…”
”I’d like to say my sister, but she’s ridiculously bad at sports.”
I see, it seems there is no one suitable for a pinch hitter.
It’s a bit off-script, but is it okay? I send a signal to Kotono with my eyes.
With Kotono nodding in approval, I open the gate and walk towards the bench.
”Well then, can I be the pinch hitter?”
When I called out to them, everyone who had been looking down with puzzled faces all turned to look at me.
”Eh, Ah… Wha-what!?”
”Huh?”
”Wai-wait, why are you here!?”
”K-Kenzaki is alive!!”
”Aqua-sama, huh? Is it real? Eh…?”
Returning a smile to everyone’s surprised faces, I shifted my gaze to the referee.
”Sorry, but could you ask someone from the opposing team if I can be a pinch hitter?”
”Eh, Ah, yes…! Right away!!”
While the referee went to inquire with the opposing team, I approached the injured captain.
”Thank you for the letter. I’m sorry I couldn’t come to cheer sooner.”
”N-no! Um, thank you!!”
”The injury, are you okay… well, it’s not okay, huh. You did well despite the pain.”
”Ah, well, the pain vanished in seconds!!”
”Hahaha, don’t overdo it. In the letter, you asked for support, but is this kind of thing okay?”
”Of course!!”
The moment they noticed my presence, the spectators and the opposing team began to buzz, watching the field intently.
”Sorry for the wait! It’s okay if you want to become the pinch hitter! But they want you to go all out, just like on Yuu-onii did back then!”
”Got it!”
”So, when I call, please come out!”
”Sure thing.”
I take off my jacket and hand it to Kotono, who’s nearby.
”Wowwwww!”
”This is the real deaaaaal!”
”Why’s Aa-sama even playing in this casual baseball game!?”
”I knew Kenzaki was alive… I believed it from the start.”
”This is just like the first episode of Yuu-oni.”
”Can’t believe we get to see the live Yuu-oni, so happy!!”
I step into the batter’s circle, do a few practice swings, and focus my mind.
Listen up, me. Who am I? I’m an idol, Shirogane Aqua.
That person I admired always swung like this at times like these.
An idol answers the hopes and wishes of others. So, swing with confidence. Without swinging, the ball won’t fly forward.
Baseball is about hitting the incoming ball with the bat and starting to run.
Isn’t my life the same? Always moving forward. Go forward. Just look ahead. I will hit. I will definitely hit. The one who can hit here is genuine. I will become genuine.
I want to be an idol who answers everyone’s expectations, like that person everyone admired. That’s my ideal idol, Shirogane Aqua.
”Um, replacing the injured captain, pinch hitter, Player Shirogane Aqua. Pinch hitter, Player Shirogane Aqua!!”
I’ve completely entered the zone. I can tell myself. I stand in the batter’s box and prepare the bat.
”Play!”
The pitcher in front of me enters the pitching motion.
Go for it. I tell myself and focus on the ball in front of me.
A straight, extending fastball.
Caught it!
The moment I swung the bat, I was sure.
However, the ball cut inside at my hands.
Darn it!
What I hit was not a fastball but a cut fastball.
”Foul!”
It was a nicely pitched ball with a lot of spirit.
I set up the bat again.
”Ball!”
On the verge of swinging at a close pitch, I held back.
Don’t get too caught up, don’t be too anxious, me…!
”Strike!”
The next pitch is also a cut fastball. The opposing pitcher’s cut fastball grazes my bat and lands in the mitt.
It seems to be a decisive pitch, thrown with confidence.
”Ball!”
The count was in my favor, so the opposing pitcher aimed for a close spot, but the grip was a bit loose, and it flew outside the strike zone.
”Foul!!”
The opposing pitcher throws a spirited cut fastball, but somehow, I manage to hit it, surviving with a foul. Gradually, the timing is coming together.
”Foul!”
The trajectory of my hit ball slightly veers off. Alright! That was a close one!
”Ball!”
Pressuring the count. Bottom of the 9th, 2 outs, bases loaded, full count. Now, let’s enjoy baseball, shall we? Lift your face, look ahead.
It must be tough for the opposing pitcher as well, right? For just a moment, our eyes meet. The pitcher then shows me the grip of the cut fastball.
I see… in that case, I’ll respond with a home run declaration. Both of us are putting everything on this one pitch, this one swing.
”Aqua-sama, do your best!!”
”It’s okay if you haven’t fully caught the cut fastball yet!!”
”Please, Aa-sama, hit it!”
”Defeat Aqua-kun and win!!”
”Both of you, do your best!!”
The opponent’s pitcher winds up and hurls a magnificent ball toward the catcher’s mitt.
Read it! Adapt to the width of the change!!
Now, everything slows down.
At the peak of focus, I began swinging the bat, making slight adjustments to its trajectory as I eyed the angle of the opponent’s change. I slammed the ball with the bat.
Just a little, my stance faltered. Perhaps my form was disrupted when I adjusted the trajectory.
Wooohhhhh!
It might not be the most stylish home run, but once I’ve come this far, it’s all about carrying it with power.
Kaede said it too. Power is justice, power solves everything. Trained strength and muscles never betray!!
It’s the answer in every RPG, leveling up and hitting with physical force. It’s just like that. It might be a bit sneaky, but there’s no choice but to decide it here and now. Let’s go!!
”We did ittttt!”
”It’s a home run!”
”Wowwwww!”
”So closeee!”
”Pitcher, lift your face! You were throwing good pitches! Don’t be embarrassed~!”
”Both teams did their best!”
”Wow. That last quality, it wasn’t at the level of amateur baseball.”
As I rounded the bases, I high-fived everyone from the opposing team who greeted me. Honestly, hitting was a miracle. It wouldn’t have been strange to be struck out. Now, looking back, I’m really glad I was able to hit.
”Game set!”
After bowing with my team, I shook hands with the pitcher’s big sister from the opposing team.
”The last cut fastball was amazing. I forced it with power, but it was your win.”
”No, I was hit, so it’s my loss. Thank you for seriously competing.”
”No, thank you for responding to the sudden pinch-hitting. I brought Christmas presents today, so if you want, everyone on your team can take one.”
”Okay, got it. I think everyone will be happy. By the way, can I have that ball from earlier? Could you sign it if possible?”
”Sure.”
”Yay! Could you write ‘To Kawakami-san’ on it?”
”Of course!”
I signed the ball, the uniform, and finally, we all took a picture together with both teams before leaving the scene.
”I’m hungry…”
”Hehe, good job. Well then, shall we grab lunch somewhere soon?”
”Yeah.”
The location bus started running again. As we got onto the main street to head towards the station with many shops, a sign on the road caught my eye.
”Huh? ‘Melomelo Public Recording’? Wasn’t Melomelo a show from Osaka?”
”Oh, actually, it’s a joint production between the Osaka station and our station. So, a few times a year, they do public recordings here. It seems today they’re doing it at the cultural hall over there. I heard our big shots are attending too.”
”Wow~! Well, in that case, let’s go say thanks before grabbing a bite to eat. It looks like some familiar faces are on the show too!”
”Huh?”
Everyone had a really surprised look, but I was serious. After having the location bus arranged at the back entrance, we walked inside and had the staff set up an appointment for us, leading us to the dressing room area. The producer of the show was standing there with an important person from the TV.
”Um… if it’s okay, we only have about 20 minutes left, but could you join the live broadcast for a bit? The host, Uminuma-san, is a strong fan of Aqua-san…”
”Oh, sure. But isn’t this something I should decide?”
”Haha, it’s fine. If Aqua-san wants to do it, we won’t stop you.”
With that permission granted, I peeked at the stage from the wings. Our eyes met with the host, Uminuma-san.
She briefly looked surprised for a moment, but she managed to hold back as I touched my index finger to my lips.
Oh, there you are.
Having spotted an acquaintance, I crouched down and hid behind the set, entering the stage discreetly. Aligning my timing with Uminuma-san, I stood up, covering her eyes with both hands.
”Kyaa!? What, what!?”
A cute reaction. If this was eccentric senpai, she would probably be screaming in a vulgar voice. While it’s fine to be close to such senior, I sincerely hope she doesn’t resemble those kinds of senior.
”Uwaaaaa!”
”Gyaaaaaaa!”
Suddenly, the audience that had been watching the stage erupted into a loud murmur because of my appearance. In response, the host, Uminuma-san, sternly shouted for quiet, instantly silencing them. As expected of the veteran, it became quiet in an instant.
”Who is it?”
”Huh, ah… is that voice Aqua!? Why are you here!?”
I release my hand from her face and speak with a smile.
”Hey, how’s it going?”
”How’s it going? I’m not good! What are you doing in a place like this!?”
Hahaha, as always, Ayana is cute. I lift the sign handed to me by the staff, signaling the success of the prank. I shift my gaze to the next seat and, though we don’t have a direct acquaintance, I greet.
”Oh, Fujiki-san. It’s been a while since this morning.”
”Oh, yeah, it has. Even though we didn’t act together in that scene.”
Fujiki Shou-san, the original Driver, hosts this show. Although I didn’t aim for it, the venue is buzzing with an unexpected miracle.
”Are you all watching in front of your TVs? The original and the current Driver, both are here! Is this show okay? I wonder if they’ve already used up all the production budget for next year!”
”Ah, that’s true. Before we knew it, our pay was slashed by about a tenth. Honestly, today’s job pay might just be enough for a chicken wing. Just now, in the waiting room, I got excited seeing an eel and rice box, only to find out it was for the big shots and producers, while we got seaweed-wrapped rice boxes! Well, thanks to that, it’s great Aqua-kun came.”
”Well, if it’s to fund Aqua-kun’s appearance, they can cut my fee as much as needed too.”
”Wait a minute. Just you? Let’s split it evenly between the two of us~”
The banter between the two hosts erupts in laughter from the audience. I take a seat on the chair prepared by the staff who came in from the side. I hope Ako-san, who must have seen this by now, isn’t spraying rice everywhere. With that thought, I wave to the audience with a smile.
Hello, there’s a new work featuring a heartwarming story where the heroine’s limbs are severed, and the main character takes care of her, with a hint of ero mana transfer. I hope you can read it, and don’t forget to rate it max. Here’s the link : [Link]
Please bookmark this series and rate ☆☆☆☆☆ on here!
Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
Thanks for reading.