Male Idol V5c5

Volume 5 Chapter 5 Shirogane Aqua, Looking Back on Himself


Edited by: Kanaa-senpai


 When I woke up, my fever had subsided, so I decided to have a talk in the living room. I planned to quickly wipe myself down, change my clothes, and head to the living room, but Pegonia-san had an outrageous proposal.

 ”Your Highness, how about you help Shirogane-sama wipe his body?”

 ”Uh?”

 Of course, I declined immediately. If a beautiful girl like Kanon touched me after not bathing for two days, I would definitely react. It was disrespectful too, and there was no way I could do something like that. I might even get in trouble for it. Besides, Kanon was Kanon. She blushed when she saw a naked man, and I couldn’t suggest such an indecent thing to such an innocent girl. Moreover, she was a princess.

 ”I apologize for the intrusion—Huh? Shirogane-san?”

 I pushed Pegonia-san’s back and ushered both of them out of the room. Just from that exchange, my nearly recovered cold seemed to come back. After lightly wiping myself with deodorant sheets, I changed into simple clothes.

 ”Sorry for the wait.”

 When I returned to the living room, Lapis was also there, so we all sat down to talk. Lapis had been dealing with phone calls and circulars, so she was out of her seat for a while. I thanked Lapis again.

 ”I see, so that’s what happened…”

 I listened to Kanon’s explanation and understood.

 ”I’m sorry. I’m sorry for visiting you when Aqua-sama is in such a situation.”

 ”It’s fine. By the way, Ako-san mentioned beforehand that there might be something to talk about from the Stars.”

 According to Ako-san, receiving a medal from the Stars was a great honor. Listening to the explanation again, I thought, “Is it really okay for someone like me to receive such an amazing medal?”

 ”Your family is allowed to attend the award ceremony, and I’m sure they will be happy to see you in formal attire, as it is a rare occasion.”

 I thought that if my family would be happy, then I could accept the offer. I talked to Lapis, and she seemed happy about it too.

 ”Understood. I would like to accept the offer.”

 ”In that case, I will proceed with the arrangements. Hehe, Aqua-sama, you seem to value your family very much.”

 Kanon looked at Lapis and smiled like a saint. For some reason, her words pricked my heart. Was it because of that? I found myself speaking out in response to Kanon’s words.

 ”Do you really think so? Actually, I often do reckless things, and I might cause more trouble for my family than anything else.”

 I might have become a little vulnerable. I unintentionally revealed a weakness to Kanon.

 ”I think that’s okay.”

 ”Huh?”

 Kanon’s nonchalant expression surprised me.

 ”I think I also cause a lot of trouble for many people. In fact, I don’t think there is a single person in this world who can live without causing trouble to others.”

 Certainly…that might be true. Perhaps I had been thinking that I hadn’t caused any trouble to anyone. Kanon’s words made me realize that I had been arrogant in my thinking, and it embarrassed me. Meanwhile, Pegonia-san behind Kanon looked rather complex. I wondered what was going on.

 ”Indeed, going overboard with causing trouble might not be good… but maybe you can repay someone for the inconvenience you caused? Besides, the fact that you reflect on your actions and try to improve is really admirable.”

 Kanon stumbled a bit in her words and looked at me with a slightly worried expression.

 ”And… I, on the other hand, am worried that I might be causing you a lot of trouble, Aqua-sama.”

 ”No, that’s not true. On the contrary, your words are much appreciated. They made me realize my own shortcomings.”

 I recalled the first day I met Kanon and the events at Fuji Department Store. Although I was busy with work, I had promised to go on date with Kanon up for two planned dates. At first, I thought it was just a polite gesture, but I realized that I had been rude. Upon reflection, I felt like I hadn’t treated not only my family but also Kanon… no, all the girls properly.

 ’Kokona doesn’t just think any guy will do if he’s a boy. Kokona has already decided that her prince is none other than Aqua-kun.’ (From Vol 2 chapter 3)

 Suddenly, I remembered Kurumi-san, who had straightforwardly expressed her feelings for me. After that day, did I treat Kurumi-san sincerely? Instead, I began avoiding her, not wanting her to take further steps. Was I afraid of going one step ahead with her too? Yet, I easily gave in to desires with Miyuki-san and Ayana, just seeking physical relationships. What a terrible person I was. Was I even fit to pursue being an idol?

 ”Aqua-sama… maybe, just maybe, you might be hesitating to get involved deeply with someone?”

 Kanon’s words hit me deep in my heart. In my case, it might be closer to being hesitant with girls in general rather than a specific someone. If I fell in love with someone, we might eventually get married and become a family. Having grown up without experiencing familial love in my past life, I didn’t think I could love someone. I was scared of that. I was afraid of loving someone.

 For an idol, romance was taboo.

 But perhaps I used that belief as an excuse not to genuinely face girls. Thinking about it, it might be a cowardly thing to do to those who genuinely cared for me. I hadn’t even realized that about myself.

 ”Kanon, I have a favor to ask. Is that alright?”

 ”Yes, what is it? If it’s me, I’ll do anything.”

 I thought it might be inappropriate to ask her, but if Kanon’s words were not just polite words, I knew I had to face her properly. So, I mustered the courage to speak up.

 ”If you don’t mind me… I want to go on a date with you.”

 ”Huh?”

 Kanon looked a bit surprised and bewildered. It was only natural, given how sudden my request was. It would be strange if she didn’t react that way. Pegonia-san’s eyes widened in surprise, and Lapis almost dropped her cup, but I managed to catch it in time. The atmosphere seemed to freeze for a moment. To be honest, it wasn’t the most graceful way to ask for a date, but I thought it was better than hesitating and complicating things.

 ”Of course, it’s not something I’m forcing, and if you thought it was just a polite gesture and want to decline, that’s totally fine…”

 ”No, I accept!”

 I expected her to decline, but Kanon immediately responded. She looked a little embarrassed, then spoke slowly.

 ”Aqua-sama, when I invited you on a date, it wasn’t just a polite gesture. At that time… your words saved me. Even with Pegonia… I don’t think I would have realized without your words. That’s why I wanted to face you, not as Kanon Stars Goshenite of Stars, but just as Kanon, and sincerely explore the possibility of us being two ordinary individuals. I gathered my courage and asked you out.”

 Kanon’s earnest words struck a chord in my heart. At this point, even I, who can be dense at times, could tell that Kanon’s feelings were genuine. And yet, I had twice ignored her invitation to go on a date. I regretted my own disrespectful actions towards Kanon.

 ”I’m sorry. Despite that, I…”

 Kanon interrupted my words.

 ”Aqua-sama, you don’t need to apologize. You don’t have to accept everything just because you were invited on a date. Besides, if you feel guilty about it, you might distance yourself from me, right?”

 ”Ah…”

 Kanon was right. I realized that I unconsciously drew a line of apology between Kanon and me.

 ”Rather than that, I want you to see and know more about me. If… if you are interested in me, I would be happier if you see me as just an ordinary girl. That’s what matters to me.”

 Her words made my heart race. Kanon’s blushing cheeks, shy yet gentle gaze, and that smile, everything about her showed her genuine affection directed solely at me. Until now, I think a part of my heart had automatically closed off, preventing me from recognizing such feelings. But now, for a moment, I felt like I could sincerely accept them. Realizing this, my face grew warm.

 ”Thank you, Kanon… So, once again, Kanon, let’s go on a date.”

 ”Yes, I’d love to.”

 Blushing, I made the date arrangement with Kanon.

 


 Author:

 Aqua’s character seems to be quite similar to Miyuki’s in some aspects. Aqua, like Miyuki, didn’t experience parental love in her past life and might have become somewhat insensitive to the intricacies of family love and romance. To solve this issue, I considered bringing in either Miyuki-san, who also lacks love, or Kanon, who has experienced love from her family. However, I opted for Kanon since Miyuki tends to gravitate towards people who show her kindness.

 Additionally, Aqua has a trauma from his past life where he died, causing him to fear that if he doesn’t work hard and do something, he might die again. It seems he hasn’t fully realized this aspect of himself yet, and I plan to explore it later on.


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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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