Volume 13 Chapter 310 Kohina Yukari, Prison Escape
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
”So anyway, I’m planning to trap Shirogane Aqua-san. Lend me your help!”
”Fufun! If that’s the case, leave it to me!”
That was how I ended up accepting the job and flying all the way to the States.
So why on earth am I the one getting locked up here!?
I was furious—the situation was nothing like what the staff originally explained!
”Move it already!”
”You don’t have to tell me twice! Geez!!”
Inko jabbed my butt with a stick, herding me toward the solitary block.
Muttering complaints, I stepped inside—only for all the inmates to slam on their bars the moment they saw my face.
”Hyahhaa! Fresh meat’s here!”
”Welcome to Platinum River Prison—straight to hell!”
”Hey rookie! What crime landed you here?”
”Don’t even dream about getting out!”
Hmph. Looks like this block is full of women.
Aqua had been dragged somewhere else, clearly a different wing.
”Oooi, this isn’t daycare! Better run home, drink Mama’s milk, little brat!”
”HAHAHAHAHA!”
They called me the “Instant-Boiler” on variety shows for a reason. My temper boiled in seconds.
”Haah!? Who the hell are you calling a brat! You wanna get blown away!?”
That face—I’ll remember it. Payback’s coming.
Behind me, Inko whispered, “She’s dead serious, huh…”
Damn right I am. I’ve always been dead serious.
”Yeah, rookie!!”
”Show ’em, girl!”
I flipped them the finger. Cheers erupted from the cages.
Hmph, you’ve gotta set the tone right from the start.
”Stop! Turn around! Good. This here’s your new cell!”
I peeked inside. Someone sat curled up in the corner, knees hugged tight.
Wait—no way. That face…
”You’re… Mikuni!?”
”Kohina Yukari…”
I spun around, grabbing Inko by the collar—she was dressed like a prison guard for some reason.
”Hey! Why the hell is Mikuni here!?”
”She’s your partner now. No fighting, y’hear?”
And with that, Inko shoved me in and locked the gate tight.
”Listen up. Rules, right now. Pay attention!”
Snatching a flip board from the next cell, Inko held it against the bars for me to read.
Rules of the Prison Escape Game – Easy Edition
Every action is monitored and turned into points.
Work hard, behave well, earn Release Points.
Collect enough, and you’re free—the game ends.
Act rebellious, lose points.
Sure, you can attempt a breakout, but fail and your Release Points reset to zero—or worse.
The prison has NPCs: some sell escape items, some trade vital info, some give jobs for points.
Work jobs or take inmate requests to earn yen. Use it for escape items or comforts.
Your sentence: 100 years. Each 10,000 yen reduces a year. Pay 1,000,000 yen and walk free instantly.
Starting funds: 100,000 yen. Good luck.
”This is way too elaborate!!”
I snapped at the board instantly.
Seriously, if they can set all this up, why couldn’t they make the signs in proper English instead of katakana!?
”‘Berry-Berry’ staff are completely insane!”
”No argument there. And why the hell do I, a V, gotta show up live—even with mosaic!? The agency’s lost it!”
Through the bars, Inko and I shook hands like comrades-in-arms.
The staff were using Mikuni too casually—she was Aqua’s mom, sure, but still.
Do they even know how much it costs to book Yukishiro Mikuni? Compared to me—the world’s top actress—her rate’s probably ten times higher!
”Well, hang in there, Yukari. I’ll drop by now and then.”
”Yeah.”
Inko walked off, leaving me alone with Mikuni. I turned to her.
”So… why are you here?”
”U-uh… I accidentally ate Marin-chan’s special ice cream. That’s my crime…”
Unbelievable.
This is Yukishiro Mikuni! World-class actress! If you’re gonna throw her in jail, at least make up a proper, big-time crime! The staff here are so sloppy!
”Fine then. Let’s bust out together. We’ll apologize to Marin-san on the way. Don’t worry—I’ll help smooth it over. She’ll forgive you.”
”…Yeah.”
Wiping her teary eyes, Mikuni rose to her feet.
”Kohina Yukari… let’s work together.”
”Yeah. We’re escaping for sure!”
Mikuni and I sealed our pact with a firm handshake.
Alright… now the real problem begins.
There’s no way I’m wasting time working like some model prisoner just to rack up release points. The only option is escape—and for that, I need intel.
”Come to think of it, Inko said there’s an inmate who trades escape info, right?”
”Yeah. You’ll want to find the informant they call Keynote.”
Keynote, huh? So that’s the codename of this so-called dealer.
”The question is, how do I even meet her?”
”No problem. Exercise time’s about to start.”
A loud buzzer suddenly echoed across the prison block where Mikuni and I were held.
What!? What’s going on!?
Clinging to the bars, I looked toward the sound. Inko strolled out, banging a frying pan like it was a gong.
”Exercise time, y’all! Out you go!!”
Ah, so that’s how it works.
The lock on our cell door clicked open.
And again—I’m telling you, if they have the budget to automate all this, they definitely had enough to put English on the signs instead of katakana!!
Mikuni and I stepped out, joining the flow toward the yard.
”Look there, Kohina Yukari. That’s Keynote.”
”Got it. I’ll go talk to her.”
I slipped closer from behind. Hm? That back… it looks kind of familiar.
Whatever. I tapped the woman on the shoulder.
”Hey. You’re Keynote, right? I heard you’ve got info for sale.”
She turned slowly, and my jaw dropped.
”Kohina Yukari. So you’ve finally been caught too.”
”You’ve gotta be kidding me! Reira!? What the hell are you doing here!?”
I clutched my head. Kuga Reira, world-class actress—right in front of me!
Damn those “Berry-Berry” staff. Just because she’s a Mikuni fangirl and easy bait for any program Mikuni’s on, they think it’s fine to toss her into this circus!?
”I’m not Reira. I’m Keynote.”
”Whatever! Just cough up the info already!!”
Reira spread her hands with a weary look.
”Careful, Kohina Yukari. Show that attitude to an informant, and you might lose your best source.”
Grrrhh! My fists shook with rage.
Mikuni hurried over, stepping between us.
”Rei… Keynote. Forgive her. She only just got here. For my sake, can’t you let it slide?”
”If Mikuni-sama asks, of course!!”
What the hell!? She treats me like dirt but bows down to Mikuni!?
I stomped the ground in frustration.
”Listen up, Kohina Yukari. For your newbie sake, I’ll introduce some key figures. Pay close attention.”
”…Fine.”
Reira leaned in and pointed across the yard.
”That’s Teabag.”
”Teabag!? Wait—that’s Maron!!”
Why is Maron in prison too!?
She’s supposed to be the only decent soul among our whole generation of troublemakers! What could she have done!?
”They say she was doing a swimsuit shoot on a beach here in the States… wearing just a teabag. Someone called the cops. It’s not technically illegal, but the court ruled her appearance was so indecent she got slapped with eighty-six years. Everyone here respects her now and calls her Teabag. Those sultry women around her? Her followers. Be careful.”
Pathetic!!
Reira then pointed to the chapel in the corner of the yard.
”See the nun there? They call her Herb Tea. She runs underground gambling during exercise. If you want to grow your cash, go to her. But lose, and you’ll walk away broke.”
Hmm. That nun outfit—Herb Tea, huh. Can’t see her face, but something about her seems familiar. Am I imagining it?
”Why call her Herb Tea?”
”Because despite raking in money, she spends it helping broke inmates. But since she gives it all away, she’s always starving. To fill her stomach, she brews the grass growing here into herbal tea. That’s why.”
And that person runs the gambling ring!? Total contradiction!! These people are insane!!
”Next, look over there.”
”Yeah, yeah.”
I followed her finger.
”That’s Powermanko.”
”Whoa, timeout!! I don’t care if they censor it, that name’s way over the line!!”
I locked eyes with Iria, lounging on a chair.
Phew. At least it wasn’t Kaede—pregnant as she is. So the staff still have some shred of decency.
”She runs pro-wrestling bets. Win, and you get enough cash for instant release. But don’t fall for it. Everyone who tried says she’s unbeatable. No matter how you dodge, she closes the gap instantly. Can’t escape her Screwdriver—aka Flying Dragon Tornado Throw. Call a timeout, she still hurls you. They say a Texas Cloverleaf can counter her, but no one even gets close. The only hope is an Erosion Can from the supplier. But Herb Tea buys them all out the moment they appear.”
This is pure nightmare difficulty!!
I tore my eyes away from Iria—waste of time.
”If you need anything else, just ask guard Sayamu Inko at mealtime. She’s the supplier.”
Got it. I thanked Reira for the intel.
”Remember, it won’t be free next time.”
”Yeah, yeah, I know.”
Parting ways with Reira and Mikuni, I drifted toward the fence that split the yard in two.
From inside the building, I spotted Aqua walking out with that annoyingly serious face of his.
”Hey! Aqua!”
”…Kohina-senpai? What is it?”
”What is it? That’s all you’ve got to say!? I’ve been worried about you ever since they dragged you to a different block!”
”You didn’t get messed with or anything, right? You’re okay?”
”I’m fine here.”
”But Kohina-senpai, you’re not seriously thinking about breaking out, are you?”
What the—! And what’s wrong with that, huh!?
He spread his arms, sighing like he was the reasonable one here.
”Listen. We committed crimes. That means we serve our time and leave the right way.”
Muuuugh!! And here I was, planning an escape for your sake too! Is this what they mean by ‘a child never knows a parent’s heart’!?
”Shirogane Aqua, exercise time. Hurry up.”
”Yes, ma’am!”
He replied with a smile, running straight toward Ayana-chan in a prison guard outfit.
Hold on—why is his guard Ayana-chan while mine is Inko!? The gap is ridiculous!! I whipped my head around, glaring straight into the security camera.
”Hey! Don’t waste Ayana-chan on him! Swap guards with me right now!!”
The buzzer blared, loud and sharp.
Wha—what!? Don’t scare me like that!!
’Verbal abuse against guard. Kohina Yukari, Release Points: minus one.’
”WHAT!? You’ve gotta be kidding me!!”
I stomped hard—and lost another point.
Grrrhhh! Fine, just you wait! I’ll bust out of here and prove you all wrong!!
After exercise, I joined Mikuni in the cafeteria.
”That’s it. I’ll gamble. Gambling’s the only way now.”
”I really don’t think you should…”
She looked at me with worried eyes, brows drooping.
What? You’re Japan’s proud star actress, aren’t you? If you’re an actress like me, then show some guts!!
”Well, you just stay in the cage and relax. Don’t worry, I’ll earn enough for you and Aqua!”
”…If you say so.”
Shoveling down curry, I made my way to the chapel where Herb Tea was supposed to be.
According to Reira, I just had to approach after service.
So I went through the motions of prayer with the others and stepped up.
”Hey, you!”
”Eep!? W-wha-wha-what is it!?”
That voice… Emily-chan!?
Why the hell are you here!?
She quickly shoved a slip of paper into my hand, making sure the cameras didn’t catch it.
*Right now I’m working undercover as On*ni Hagetoru. Staff don’t know my true identity, so please pretend you don’t know me, Kohina-paisen!*
I gave her a flat glare. Seriously… Kanon-san’s gonna blow a fuse again. You’re pregnant—act like it and stay still already!
”Anyway, I wanna gamble.”
”A-ah, yes. Right this way, please…”
She led me deeper inside, where two people in guard cosplay were sitting—Prime Minister Habu and President Maitrix.
”…Uh, do the Prime Minister and President really have this much free time?”
”How rude! Kohina Yukari-san, this is, uh… important diplomacy. Yes, diplomacy!”
”That’s right! Sure, it might look like we’re just playing around, but actually—we are just playing around!”
See!? I knew it!!
Ugh, I swear—ever since Aqua started hanging around with Habu, Maitrix has been acting weirder and weirder.
I turned to the security camera, bowing deeply. Sorry, citizens of the States! Please forgive these idiots!!
Emily-chan cleared her throat.
”Normally, the players agree on the stakes, but since we have a beginner today, we’ll start with the minimum: ten thousand yen. Place it on the table.”
So, if all three of us agree, we could start at a hundred thousand or more, huh? Heh, at this rate I’ll rack up three million in no time!
Prime Minister Habu, President Maitrix, and I each placed a bill on the table.
”Alright. Today’s game is this. Everyone, place your minimum bet of ten thousand yen.”
Emily-chan smoothly laid out three cards on the table.
Honestly, she’s just like Aqua—capable of literally anything.
”See the joker in the middle?”
We glanced at each other and nodded.
”Now I’ll flip them over.”
One by one, she turned the cards facedown with a slow, steady motion.
”Alright. I’ll shuffle them now. Guess where the joker ends up.”
She began moving the cards around with calm precision.
Hmph. Okay, I get it.
”Alright everyone, do you know which one’s the joker?”
”This one!”
Emily-chan flipped the card.
There it was—the joker.
Yes!! I clenched my fist under the table in a tiny victory pose.
”Congratulations. Your pot doubles to sixty thousand. Each win doubles the stakes. Got it?”
I nodded, ears wide open.
”If all three of you drop out now, the money is split evenly—twenty thousand each. But if even one person stays, those who fold only get their original ten thousand back. The last one standing must then beat me three times in a card showdown to walk away. But if they quit halfway, they lose everything. Understand?”
Hmm… so, if all three fold, we split it. If one folds and two stay, the game continues. If two fold and one stays, that person gets a chance at the jackpot.
”But—splitting right after the first win is forbidden. Minimum five wins before you can divide it. At five wins, the pot is three hundred twenty thousand. Divide that three ways, it’s only about one hundred thousand each. But if you keep going just two more wins, that’s enough to buy release. Don’t you think it’d be a waste to stop early?”
Yeah, makes sense. Five wins three times only makes nine hundred sixty thousand. Still shy of the million I need.
Unlike Aqua, I had no intention of working hard. I’d gamble my way out!
”That’s all for rules. Next round.”
Her hands moved faster now, shuffling cards.
Okay, okay, left swap, then right swap… ah, there!
”Pick the joker.”
We all pointed to the far-right card.
”Correct. Your pot’s now one hundred twenty thousand. That’s forty thousand each if you split.”
Yesss!! This game’s a breeze!! Gambling beats honest labor any day!
Full of confidence, I jabbed at the next round’s card.
Wait… why am I pointing at a different one than the others?
Did I… just nail the joker all on my own!?
I shot a smug grin at Habu and Maitrix.
”The correct card is… here. Kohina Yukari, you’re out.”
”HAA!? Why only me!? That’s rigged!!”
The two of them coasted through five rounds, cashing out at nine hundred sixty thousand—splitting it cleanly into four hundred eighty thousand each.
”Tch! Next round!!”
I rolled up my orange sleeves, glaring hard.
This time I wouldn’t blink once!
”Too bad. Out again, Kohina Yukari.”
”FUNGAA!!”
Damn it!! I’d clawed my way to round five, only to lose again. Slamming two ten-thousand bills onto the table, I doubled down to recoup my losses.
Minutes later…
”Oh? Blinked too little and now you’ve got dry eye? Eye drops are sold at the supplier’s stall, by the way.”
”UGYAAAAA!!”
I ruffled my own hair in frustration. Bet twenty, lost. Bet thirty, lost again at round five.
”As expected of the Prime Minister and President. Great dynamic vision. For fairness, by the way, Morikawa Kaede, Kato Iria, and Shirogane Aqua are banned from this game.”
”What the hell!! That makes it impossible for normal people like me!! Totally unfair!!”
I pointed furiously at Emily-chan.
”Fine then. How about this—one last match, all in. Special rule: if you beat me three times straight, I’ll count it as six wins. That’s 3.2 million for you.”
”I’M IN!!”
I brushed off Habu and Maitrix’s attempts to stop me and faced Emily head-on.
One win. Two wins. My eyes tracked the joker flawlessly.
”This one!”
Emily clapped her hands.
That’s it, right? That means I won, right!? Yes!! I threw both arms up, cheering.
”Too bad. Joker’s over here.”
”Whaaaat!?” My jaw froze open.
”If I’d played, I’d have been fooled too,” Habu muttered.
”Classic sleight-of-hand. Looks like a swap, but the card never moves,” Maitrix explained.
Wait—that’s allowed!?
So the dealer’s tricks are part of the game!?
”Grrrrhhh!! Then it’s impossible for amateurs to win!!”
”Kohina Yukari, think. If card games were that simple, casinos wouldn’t exist.”
”Exactly. Gambling’s a no-go from the start.”
”Right, right!” they chimed together.
”Shut up!! Easy for you two—you already cashed out profits! And you’re guards! Aren’t you supposed to stop illegal gambling!?”
”Hahaha. Yukari, think about it—why do you think guards are here playing in the first place?”
”Yeah, it’s exactly what you think.”
Ah… I finally realized. They were part of the racket too.
”So. Kohina Yukari, better start working properly.”
”Right. There’s an inmate named Aburamotterucchi who hands out jobs. Go find them.”
”Tch… fine!! I’ll work, alright!? I’ll work!!”
Slamming the table, I stood up.
”Kamo Hina-senpai (sucker), come back once you’ve saved up again, okayyy?” Emily sang out sweetly.
Who’s Kamo Hina-senpai!? Stop giving me these stupid nicknames!!
Fuming, I stormed out of the shady gambling den and kicked the chapel door on my way out.
I am never coming back here!!
And what’s with this so-called holy statue!? Now that I look closely—it’s Aqua’s face!?
Tch—ptooey! I spat at it, only to see the statue smiling like it was happy about it. Ugh, creepy!!
”Oh, welcome back. S-so… how was it?”
”Don’t know!!”
I sulked all the way back to my cell, dove under the blanket, and pouted myself to sleep.
The next morning…
”Kohina Yukari, minus one point for your messy futon. Minus one for skipping bath yesterday. Minus one for not fixing your hair. And since I had to drag you out of bed, minus one for oversleeping. Total, minus four.”
”Haah!? You’ve gotta be kidding me!!”
I lunged at Inko on the other side of the bars.
”Wait a sec! This whole thing was supposed to be about tricking Aqua! Why am I the one stuck doing all this!?”
Seriously. There’s no reason for me to be in prison at all!
So just let me out already!!
”This is why.”
Inko pulled out a script from the staff and slapped it against the bars.
I’d seen that script during prep meetings.
”De-rooon!”
She peeled the sticker off the cover.
I squinted at the revealed title.
[Kohina Yukari, rehabilitation program]
…Excuse me, WHAT!?
”Exactly this!!”
She shoved a tablet in my face.
On the screen, I saw Ayana-chan with a glazed look, Akocchi, Emily-chan, and Aqua all talking about my daily life.
”Kohina Yukari. Actress. Can work, but can’t clean. Can’t wake up alone. Skips baths. Doesn’t put away dishes. Leaves toys scattered. All the proof is here—she’s a full-on social misfit!!”
Wha—hold it! Akocchi’s messy room is way worse! Why isn’t she in here!?
Eh? Because she’s ‘a little better’? Don’t care!!
”So Yukari! You’ll fix your daily life habits and rehabilitate here!!”
”Nooooooo!!”
Wait… then what about Aqua?
Why is he locked up!?
”Oh, Aqua-kun? He worked hard for Stars, so he’s enjoying his own paradise program. It’s a reverse-prank planned by ‘Berry-Berry’ staff. Everything’s arranged to make him happy. Yukari, the moment you saw Ayana-chan as his guard, you should’ve caught on.”
…They tricked meeeeeee!!
I collapsed on the spot. Turns out this was a serious ‘Berry-Berry’, and I’d be living behind bars for a whole week.
During lunch one day, breaking news aired: a terror attack in the White Room.
But apparently, Aqua just happened to be there on a school trip, and thanks to his “Aqua powers,” the President and everyone else survived.
…Wait. Don’t tell me that was also the staff’s doing?
Eh? No, that was real?
Oh. Then condolences to the attackers—picking the exact moment Aqua was touring the place.
Still… that guy really needs a purification ritual. It’s like he attracts terrorism just by walking down the street.
As the extra inmates around me stared blankly, I just kept spooning curry into my mouth.
—
By the way, unlike “Kamo Hina-senpai (Sucker)” here, Aqua’s arc is pure reward.
You don’t need his POV, right? He’s just enjoying a normal class trip.
And one more thing: if you figure out the reference for Powermanko, don’t write the lyrics. The Nocturne folks will come after you!!
Please bookmark this series and rate ☆☆☆☆☆ on here!
Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
Thanks for reading.
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