Volume 13 Chapter 383 Shirogane Kanon, I Want to Play This Pretend Game Too!!
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
On the morning of January 1st, a quiet peace settled over the room after we finished our traditional New Year’s feast.
I glanced over at Shirogane Aqua, who was standing a short distance away. He was busy handing out small, decorated envelopes of New Year’s money to the younger children.
”Here you go, everyone! Happy New Year!” Aqua said with a grin.
”Thank you, Brother!” one replied.
”I got one!” another cheered.
”Thanks, Papa!”
”Yay! Aqua-sama, I love you!”
I couldn’t help but smile. They all looked so happy receiving their gifts from him. But as I watched the heartwarming scene, I spotted a familiar face lurking among the kids.
”Hehe… e-hehe… thank you very much,” Emily-senpai snickered, her voice thick with greed.
Emily-senpai, what on earth are you doing in line with the children? I shared a look with Nee-san sitting next to me. We both looked a little pained. Why was it that Emily-senpai worked so hard yet was always completely broke? It had to be one of the great mysteries of this world, right up there with Aqua’s very existence.
I looked back at Aqua just as Kohina Yukari, dressed in a stunning kimono, stepped up to him and shoved an envelope into his hand.
”Here,” Yukari said.
Aqua looked back and forth between the envelope and her face. “Kohina-senpai… I’m really fine without any money, you know?”
”Hah?! You’re still a brat, so just shut up and be happy I’m giving you something!” Yukari snapped. She pressed the envelope hard against Aqua’s cheek.
I’d never seen someone aggressively force a gift on someone like that before.
”Well… in that case, I’ll take it. Thanks,” Aqua muttered.
”Good,” Yukari replied. She leaned in, pointing a finger directly at his nose. “Now listen. Use this money for something meaningful. Buy some reference books or new pens. Don’t you dare spend my money on… on filth! No adult magazines!”
”I get it, I get it…” Aqua sighed.
The room erupted in soft laughter at their exchange. Those two were always so close, yet they never seemed to actually get anywhere. Maybe that was another one of the world’s mysteries.
Aqua looked away from Yukari and grumbled just loud enough for everyone to hear, “Damn. There goes my plan to buy the Welcoming Spring, Huge Breast Dripping Wet Housewife Paradise New Year’s Kimono Special Issue!”
”See?! That’s exactly what I mean!” Yukari yelled. “What kind of stupid title is that anyway? If you’re going to buy something like that, pick something better! Like… like Ayana-chan’s gravure¹ or something!!”
”Wait a minute!?”
Ayana-chan, who got dragged into it, turns her face bright red. Behind that Ayana-chan, the group of Marin mother-in-law wearing kimonos were fluttering their chests while peeking toward Aqua. …Aqua-kun, even if you don’t go out of your way to spend money to buy such a book, the real kimono beauties are right there.
While I was lost in thought, Emily-senpai, who received otoshidama² from Kohina Yukari, Grandma Mary, Fuji Ranko, and Prime Minister Habu… and even from the younger Kukuri-chan, came to my place with a smile while clutching her spoils in both hands.
”Yo, Tashinami! Did you properly get poked by Aqua-sama’s eggplant-sama in your first dream of the year? Look, they say 1 is Fuji, 2 is Hawk, 3 is Aqua-sama’s eggplant, right? Guhehe!”
I nearly tripped over my own feet.
”I- There’s no way I’d see that, you idiot!!”
Really, honestly! Emily-senpai, if you say any more worthless things, I won’t give you the otoshidama from me. I sharply avert my face from Emily-senpai.
”Sow-y, sow-y!”
Good grief, it can’t be helped. I hand over the otoshidama I had prepared to Emily-senpai.
”Guhehe, there’s nothing as pathetic as an otoshidama you get from someone younger even though you’re an adult. I can’t get enough of it…”
Emily-senpai rejoices while crying. Honestly! Since it’s Emily-senpai anyway, during the short period from Christmas to the end of the year, she probably said something like “it’s a slightly early otoshidama from me” and gave it to people troubled for money while acting cool!! I didn’t see that scene, but I can just tell!!
”Hey, more importantly, isn’t it about time for the Taiga drama³ to start?”
”That’s why I’m keeping the spot in front of the TV even while being away from Aqua-kun on purpose.”
I make a face at Emily-senpai like “What are you talking about?”.
”As expected of Tashinami…. You don’t waver at all from New Year’s. Don’t you stop.”
”Yes, yes. More than that, since Emily-senpai is a pregnant woman, please sit in the chair quickly.”
I make Emily-senpai sit next to me and watch the TV screen intently. A little over a month since that Episode Zero…. Finally, that Taiga drama starts today. I inflate my chest with expectation.
”Ah, it started.”
The screen slowly fades in. Then, with Mount Fuji in the background, a scene of two horses galloping on a sandy beach was projected. The persons riding those two horses slowly approach toward here.
”Ah, it’s Kukuri and Aqua-sama!”
Kyaaa! Aqua-kun riding the black horse is cool too, but Kukuri-chan riding the white horse is also cool!! With the cool BGM that stays in one’s ears excessively in the background, the title of the Taiga drama is projected.
[The World-Reforming Princess]
Yukishiro Toya played by Aqua-kun and Sumeragi Ichiya played by Kukuri-chan stare at each other while running side-by-side on horseback. As expected, these two make a great picture. While we were engrossed, the group in the back started getting rowdy.
”Hakuryuu-sensei!”
”It’s too early to faint! Don’t die yet!”
Hakuryuu-sensei… nothing has even started yet, you know!?
”Kuh! Hakuryuu-sensei can use that rare power of delusion to read ahead in the story and faint!”
”As expected. Hakuryuu-sensei!”
”This is also Hakuryuu-sensei’s power of delusion… no, it’s because she has too much talent!”
Grandma Mary and the others look like they’re having a lot of fun. Well, I guess I can leave them alone…. I concentrate on the screen again. After the opening credits, the scene shifted to a bustling castle town. A man walked into a small, plain-looking eatery.
’Are you open?’
’Sure thing! Take a seat!’
A tray with food placed on it is carried in front of the person who took a seat. I see, a one-course meal house that existed in the Edo period, what would be called a set-meal restaurant nowadays. There, one woman wearing a kimono came in.
’Excuse me.’
Ah! It’s Sumeragi Ichiya played by Kukuri-chan!! Wow~, the cherry-blossom pink kimono looks gorgeous on her!!
’Ah, Oichi-chan! Just you today?’
’Yes.’
Oichi-chan? Maybe she’s using an alias? Sumeragi Ichiya waits for the food to come out after sitting in the prepared seat. Then, the woman who was eating rice earlier tilts her head.
’Ma’am, hasn’t the amount of white rice become a bit less?’
’Sorry about that. The rice supply has been thin lately. We might have to start mixing it with grains soon.’
While Ichiya-chan is eating, she listens to the conversation of the two.
’I didn’t hear anything about a bad harvest back in the country, so it’s strange, isn’t it.’
’Maybe there’s a famine somewhere else and they’re diverting the stock.’
I remembered learning about the great famines of the Edo period. It was because of those disasters that modern Japan eventually industrialized its farming to ensure prices stayed stable. It’s why people say Japan is the most food-secure nation in the world now.
’Well, I better get back to work.’
’Take care!’
The proprietress waves her hand to the customer paying and leaving. Ichiya-chan also finished her meal, took a sip of the tea in the teacup, and then stood up from her seat.
’Ma’am, thank you for the meal. It was delicious today too.’
’Oh my! Thank you. Oichi-chan is the only one who says such things at our shop!’
The proprietress makes an entranced face toward Oichi-chan. Yes, yes, I understand. I understand. Kukuri-chan with her hair tied back looked so dignified—the perfect mix of cute and cool.
’Is the rice shortage affecting everyone?’
’Yeah. Even the sushi master down the street is complaining. He’s been making the rice balls smaller just to keep up,’ the shopkeeper whispered.
Ichiya-chan leans her chin on her hand, looking thoughtful. Behind me, Ranko-san was watching the screen with her hands clasped as if she were praying.
’Is something wrong, Oichi-chan?’
’No, nothing. I just love rice, so I’d be sad if I couldn’t eat my fill.’
Ichiya broke into a bright smile and patted her stomach. The customers who seem like regulars who saw that burst out laughing.
’Haha! Well, you’re at that age where you’re still growing!’
’That’s right! Next time you come in, I’ll give you some of my portion so you can grow up big and strong!’
The lady represents the swelling of the chest with both hands. At that moment, I felt like a cold air was coming from around Kukuri-chan a little bit, but I’ll decide it was my imagination!!
On the other hand, inside the screen, the wryly smiling Ichiya notices an acquaintance with a gloomy face in the corner of the one-course meal house.
’Otsuru-chan? What’s the matter?’
’Ah… Oichi-chan. I-It’s nothing. I’m just not very hungry today.’
Otsuru behaves stoutly. Although Ichiya predicts that something happened to Otsuru, she gives up seeing that Otsuru doesn’t tell anything.
’Otsuru-chan, if anything happens don’t hesitate to ask.’
’I will. Thanks, Oichi-chan.’
When Ichiya finishes the bill, she waves her hand and leaves the shop. The customers who saw that began to talk in whispering voices.
’Otsuru-chan, it hasn’t been that long since your mom passed away, has it?’ an old man asked.
’Yeah,’ another replied. ‘She was in the kitchen department at the Finance Magistrate’s⁴ office, right? I heard it was a freak accident. Poor thing.’
It really was heartbreaking. I felt my face fall. Meanwhile, another customer sighed as they watched Ichiya leave the shop.
’Ah, Oichi-chan,’ the woman whispered. ‘She’s so cute, so fragile, yet so dignified… and she seems so well-bred. I wonder if she has a suitor?’
It seemed Kukuri-chan is a regular here. Another customer cupped her cheeks, a dreamy look in her eyes.
’Oh, honey, don’t even go there,’ the landlady said, leaning back proudly with her hands on her hips. ‘Oichi-chan already has an exceptionally wonderful man in her life.’
The scene shifted. Ichiya-chan stepped into a small house in town.
’I’m home!’
’W-W-Welcome home, Ichiya-sama!’
OH MY GOOOOOD! SO COOOOOL!
Yukishiro Touya – played by the actor Aqua – greeted Ichiya-chan while dressed in a stunning kimono.
”They’re already living like newlyweds!” I screamed. “Hakuryuu-sensei, look!”
Behind me, I heard the thud of Hakuryuu-sensei actually collapsing. I totally got it. This was pure domestic bliss!!
’That’s not right!’ Oichi snapped, turning her face away as her cheeks flushed pink. ‘Right now, I’m not Ichiya, I’m O-i-chi! And if you keep using that formal speech, someone will find us out. I told you to act casual. We’re supposed to be a married couple!’
So cute!!
”Man, it’s only the start of the year and he’s already trying to kill us with this much fanservice,” Emily-senpai muttered. “What a lethal performance…”
Emily-senpai probably didn’t notice, but Hakuryuu-sensei had already died twice behind us. Ichiya quickly caught Touya up on what she had overheard at the eatery.
’I see… if that’s the case, then those rumors might actually be true,’ Touya said, leaning against the central pillar with a thoughtful expression.
Ugh… why was Aqua so incredibly hot when he played these composed roles? I wanted to frame him and hang him on my wall.
’Those rumors?’
Oichi asked. She was sprawled out on the tatami mats, looking up at him. She always acted a bit more like a kid when she’s alone with Touya.
’I still need to verify the facts,’ Touya explained. ‘But I’ve received word that someone in the Finance Magistrate’s office who manages the land tax⁵ is intentionally hiding the grain. If it were to prepare for a famine, I’d understand, but the Shogunate already has plenty in reserve. Which means…’
’Someone is stashing the grain to drive up prices and line their own pockets?’
Touya nodded. I felt butterflies in my stomach just watching him. It was frustrating how charming he was!!
’Oichi,’ Touya said, correcting himself. ‘I have a lead on the warehouse. I’ll go scout the location.’
’Then I’ll see who’s pulling the strings from the shadows!’ Oichi cried, pushing herself up with sparkling eyes.
Touya sighed, shaking his head. ‘Absolutely not. I already have a lead on that. Just stay put.’
The scene cut to a mansion where Kuga Reira-san was writing. She suddenly sneezed.
”Hm? Did I catch a cold?” Reira muttered. “Or did Yukishiro pull another one of his stunts?”
The rest of us shared a wry smile. I guess Yukishiro had been a troublemaker even in this era, too.
Back at the house, Ichiya was fuming. ‘Then what am I supposed to do!’
’Stay still!’ Touya lectured. ‘Honestly, Oichi… I mean, Ichiya-sama, you need to remember your position!’
Ichiya covered her ears, humming to drown him out. It was hilarious seeing Aqua getting bossed around by a tomboy princess.
’Lalalala, I can’t hear you!’
She slipped on her sandals and stuck her tongue out at him. ‘Touya, if you keep scowling like that, you’re going to go bald before you’re thirty!’
’B-Bald!?’
Touya stammered, reaching up to touch his hair as she ran off. ‘I’m… I’m still okay, right?’
Don’t worry, Touya. If it’s Aqua, he’d probably still be hot even if he were bald. Probably nano.
”Hey, what are you doing touching your hair?” Kohina Yukari-san asked from the back of the room, pouncing on him.
”Nothing… just worried that being around you is giving me enough stress to lose my hair,” Aqua joked.
The screen shifted to Ichiya walking through the castle town, her cheeks puffed out in a pout. ‘Geez, Touya always treats me like a child…! Just you watch. I’ll find the evidence on my own!!’
Ichiya started asking around, trying to make it sound like idle gossip. But as the sun began to set, she hadn’t found a single solid lead. Haa… maybe I really am useless nano…
She trudges along the dark path. Suddenly, she spotted Otsuru ducking into an alley on the other side of the street. Otsuru looked like she was carrying the weight of the world. Ichiya followed her, eventually reaching a massive mansion. Inside the mansion, the villains were plotting.
’As expected of the Magistrate,’ a merchant chuckled, looking at a ledger. ‘Stopping the rice flow was a stroke of genius.’
’Nonsense. You’re the one who proposed the numbers,’ the Magistrate replied with a smirk. ‘You’re a wicked one, aren’t you?’
They shared a toast, but were interrupted by heavy footsteps. ‘We found a trespasser targeting your life, Magistrate!’
Otsuru-chan was thrown into the courtyard like a sack of potatoes.
’You… Kame’s daughter?’ the Magistrate asked, drawing his sword.
’You murderers!’ Otsuru screamed, glaring at them. ‘My mom found proof of your fraud in the ledgers, and you killed her for it!!’
The villains just laugh. ‘She was too honest for her own good. And now, you can join her.’
Just as the Magistrate stepped forward, a saxophone blared in the background music. It was totally anachronistic, but so cool…
’Kuroda Shichinojo Kochou. Hayashi Shinoka,’ a voice rang out. ‘I’ve heard every word of your villainy.’
Ichiya-chan stepped out of the shadows. My inner middle-schooler was screaming.
’Oichi-chan?’ Otsuru gasped.
’Oichi? Hah!’ The Magistrate leered. ‘Who do you think you are, girl?’
Ichiya-chan looked him dead in the eye. ‘You call me a girl? You fool… Kuroda, have you truly forgotten this Queen’s face?’
Kuroda’s face went pale. ‘N-No way… Your Highness!? M-My apologies!!’
Everyone in the courtyard dropped to their knees, heads hitting the dirt.
’You used your positions to line your own pockets while the people starved,” Ichiya declared, her voice ringing with authority. ‘You murdered a woman for the truth. This is unforgivable! Atone for your crimes with your lives!⁶‘
Kukuri-chan was so cool I thought my brain was going to melt.
’Fine! If that’s how it is!’ Kuroda suddenly stood up, reaching for his sword. ‘This girl is an impostor! Kill her!’
Wait, what!? If he does that, things are going to get way worse!
’Fools,’ Ichiya whispered.
The samurai charged. At the very last second, Touya blurred into motion, cutting down the attackers before they could reach her.
I stared at the TV, totally mesmerized. “Look, everyone! The cool guy with the sword protecting the princess? That’s my husband!”
’Y-you bastard… Yukishiro Touya…!’
’Hmph. If you recognize my face, you ought to know well enough that Ichiya-sama is the real deal.’
At Touya’s words, Kuroda’s face turns a furious shade of crimson.
’Agh, you’re an imposter too! Hey, you lot, what are you doing!? Cut these insolent fools down!’ Kuroda screamed.
Seriously, there’s no way there could be two people this cool even in the Edo period.
I puff out my cheeks and pout.
’Ichiya-sama, get behind me,’ Touya said.
’What are you saying? I’m fighting too, obviously!’ Ichiya replied.
Ichiya-chan stands back-to-back with Touya. The sharp ring of steel echoes as she draws her blade.
Eh!? Wait, is this a Kukuri-chan action scene!?
Oh… come to think of it, she had that Yui-style⁷ action scene in “Heaven’s Sword” too.
Kukuri-chan clicks the hilt and flips the sword into a reverse grip.
Uwaaaaaaaaaaaa! What is this needlessly epic, haunting BGM!?
’Guahhhh!’
’Gyahhh!’
Strong! So strong!!
I watch the impossibly cool swordplay of Aqua and Kukuri-chan, clapping my hands together silently.
”Did you know? Kukuri… she might not look it, but she’s a master of various martial arts thanks to that Sumeragi family training,” Emily said. “If I even try to sneak a feel of her tits to see how they’re growing, she just twists me up and tosses me like trash. Scary, right?”
Heh, I see. Well, Nee-san and I learned self-defense too, so it makes sense given our status.
But Emily-senpai? I’m two hundred percent sure you being ‘twisted and tossed’ is entirely your own fault for trying to grope her.
’Tch! If that’s how it’s going to be!!’
Wait, wait! A gun is cheating!!
Kuroda aims his pistol at Ichiya-chan.
In a flash, Aqua pulls a kunai⁸ from his vest and hurls it, knocking the gun right out of his hand.
Kyaaaaaaaa! Aqua, you’re so amazing! The kunai move is too cool!!
Having mowed down the surrounding lackeys, Touya and Ichiya corner Kuroda and Hayashi.
’Justice!’ Ichiya shouted.
As she speaks the word, she and Touya strike the two down.
S-so cool…
I watch the program’s epilogue in a total daze.
”Ugh… the ‘master and servant’ trope is just too much… I’m dying…”
”Hakuryuu-sensei is literally dead back here!”
I’m a little worried about Hakuryuu-sensei actually dying of ‘the feels’ in the back, but I want to do this ‘hero’ roleplay too, and fast!!
I glance over at Nee-san and Kaede-senpai next to me; both of them look like they can’t sit still.
Um, Kaede-senpai, you literally just gave birth, so please behave yourself for a bit.
And Emily-senpai, I know you want to join in, but you’re absolutely banned, okay!?
”Hey, maybe you should have them ‘punish’ you while they’re at it?” Emily teased.
”No way! If anyone’s getting punished, it should be Kohina-senpai, not me!” the other replied.
Good grief. I get that you two are close, but don’t start a fight on New Year’s Day.
I stand up to mediate.
Hehe. Looks like this year is going to be another fun one, thanks to Aqua.
I suppress the urge to go check the Bulletin Board⁹ immediately and head toward the two who are bickering like children.
—
Author:
I wonder how much New Year’s cash Emily actually managed to shake down…
—
Summary:
The Shirogane family and friends celebrate New Year’s Day with otoshidama and the premiere of a major Taiga drama starring Aqua and Kukuri. Emily-senpai’s shameless greed and Kohina’s tsundere lecture provide comedic relief before the group settles in to watch the show. The drama depicts a historical setting with a mystery involving a rice shortage and a distressed acquaintance.
Ichiya and Touya (played by actors) are undercover as a married couple to investigate corruption in the Finance Magistrate’s office. They discover a plot to hoard rice and drive up prices, which led to the murder of a clerk. Ichiya reveals her high-status identity to confront the villains, leading to a dramatic rescue by Touya.
The characters are watching or participating in a high-stakes period-drama roleplay scene. Aqua and Kukuri-chan showcase their martial arts prowess by defeating villains led by Kuroda. The chapter ends with the group bickering playfully and the narrator reflecting on the new year.
—
Trivia:
- Emily-senpai is currently pregnant.
- Aqua and Kukuri are acting in a historical drama called ‘The World-Reforming Princess’.
- The ‘eggplant’ joke refers to Hatsuyume (the first dream of the year) where 1: Fuji, 2: Hawk, 3: Eggplant are lucky.
- Hakuryuu-sensei is so sensitive to plot development that she faints from her own delusions.
- The setting of the drama includes a realistic rice shortage based on historical famines.
- The setting is a ‘drama-within-a-drama’ where characters are actually actors.
- Otsuru’s mother was killed because she found proof of the ledger fraud.
- The saxophone BGM is intentionally anachronistic for stylistic effect.
- Ichiya switched from her ‘commoner’ Oichi persona to her ‘Ue-sama’ (Highness) persona using the pronoun ‘Wara-wa’.
- Kaede-senpai is mentioned as having just given birth.
- Kukuri-chan’s martial arts skills come from the Sumeragi family.
- The ‘Heaven’s Sword’ reference connects this to previous character roles.
- Hakuryuu-sensei is ‘dying’ from the emotional intensity of the scene, not actual combat.
- The setting transitions from a fictional Edo-period scene back to modern group dynamics
—
Character Insight:
Aqua maintains his role as a provider and ‘older brother’ figure to the group, even while being teased about his reading habits. Emily shows a complex side—shameless in taking money, but implied to have been generous with her own earlier. Kukuri shows a sharp, possibly possessive aura (cold air) when other women’s bodies are mentioned.
Ichiya shows a desire to be taken seriously and act independently, while Touya (Aqua) balances his role as a protector with his real-life stress of dealing with his co-stars.
The narrator shows a deep, almost fanatical appreciation for ‘cool’ tropes (justice, master-servant loyalty) and Aqua’s combat skills. Emily-senpai continues her role as the group’s provocateur.
—
Behind the Scenes:
The author uses the ‘Taiga Drama’ premiere to ground the story’s timeline in the new year and showcase the success of the characters’ acting careers.
The author uses the ‘Jidaigeki’ (period drama) setting to highlight the chemistry between the lead actors, blending historical tropes with modern fandom reactions.
The author explicitly references R18/Nocturne content in the notes, indicating that the ‘Moonlight’ and ‘Toa-chan’ stories contain adult material. ‘Nocturne’ refers to the adult-focused section of the Syosetu novel platform.
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TL Notes:
Notes:
• Ken – Male. A rehabilitated man working in the mine. The fiancé of Akiyama Sachiko, the organizer of the party or one of the protagonist’s (Aqua’s) mother’s students (ikebana) appeared in Volume 2 Chapter 12. However, their engagement is not yet officially recognized, as the necessary documents have not been signed by all parties involved. Ken-kun behaves inappropriately during the event, attempting to flirt with Kanon and later becoming aggressive, even wielding a replica sword. His actions cause a disturbance, and he is eventually subdued and removed by the security team.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
Thanks for reading.
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