Chapter 32 Trauma
Edited by: Kanaa-senpai
My teeth chattered violently, causing the bed in the school infirmary to creak loudly beneath me. I sat there, hugging my own shoulders, desperately trying to suppress the rising fear and disgust. A surge of emotion welled up from the pit of my stomach, my diaphragm trembling, my teeth grinding uncontrollably, and my body shaking with a rhythmic clatter. Even a small child wouldn’t display such a pathetic sight. When my parents were still alive, even when they told me ghost stories, I only hid under the covers. I never fell apart like this.
That’s how deeply Heidemarie’s unreasonable demands and Cliff’s attack had traumatized me. The sensation of my body being restrained against my will felt similar to when my voice was taken over. Being forced to comply with someone’s demands is now tied to my deepest fear.
And Cliff’s attack—the sensation of my body melting and dripping away—inflicted a mental shock far worse than the physical pain. I desperately tried to gather the dissolving pieces of my body, but Heidemarie prevented me from doing so. Being bound by another, tormented by an unprecedented, excruciating pain, and gradually losing myself… that experience carved a new wound into my heart.
’Oh my, it seems you’re awake,’ a voice echoed in my mind.
”Ah—!”
My shoulders jumped at the voice. This voice was even more unreasonable than Heidemarie’s.
’If you stay in the infirmary, a ‘visit event’ is highly likely to occur, so let’s leave quickly.’
”Reina-chan, are you okay?” Lucia asked.
’Ugh, this lol,’ the voice added.
Lucia, is it you again… You’ve spoken to me so many times! Do you have any idea how much I’ve been worn down, body and soul, because of you…!!
”Your face looks scary… are you really okay?” she asked.
The thought that people would become unhappy if they associated with me, that I should stay away for everyone’s sake—that sentiment was now drowned in resentment and anger. I couldn’t stand Lucia’s goodwill, her kindness. My head was filled with the rage of, ‘What will you do if my voice throws a tantrum and ruins everything right now?’
”Reina, um… are you alright?”
As soon as I saw the face that appeared behind Lucia, my anger-filled mind went completely blank.
”Cl… i… ff…”
My blood drained instantly, and fear surged from the pit of my stomach to flood my chest. My trauma flashed through my mind, rendering coherent thought impossible.
”N-no… no…”
”H-hey! Are you okay!?”
”What’s wrong!?”
As the two rushed toward me, worried about my trembling and crying, they drew closer… closer…
”No! Don’t come near me! I don’t want this anymore!”
I pushed their hands away, a dry sound echoing in the room.
”…I’m sorry…” Cliff said.
He looked deeply hurt.
”Ah…”
What was I—? No, this is right! This is it… I intended to do this from the start… Nothing has changed! So…
’Let’s leave quickly,’ the voice urged.
Without a word, I jumped out of the infirmary window.
”Reina-chan!?” Lucia called.
Ow, it hurts… I was so delirious I didn’t notice… it hadn’t healed yet…
’Are you a silly child?’ the voice taunted.
The wound reopened, blood dripping from my chest. When I placed my hand there, flesh peeled away with a squelching sound.
’Let’s get out of here. That Lucia-jou (young lady) might follow us,’ it said.
Exhausted by the rapidly shifting emotions, I stood up with a blank mind and began walking. I could feel the melted flesh inside my clothes dripping down my stomach like mud.
’Ah, we’ve lost quite a bit of time,’ it remarked.
So, it was confirmed I’d be forced into something reckless again… I had tried my best, though…
’Well then, once your wound heals, let’s go see Harold-kun (boy), ^~,’ it said.
My feet stopped at the mention of his name, my breathing becoming erratic—
’Just move your feet, don’t go crazy now,’ the voice commanded.
My mind was forcibly calmed. I walked back to my room, shedding silent tears.
Notes:
• –
• Cliff – Son of First-Class Knight Lilia. Practices Flame God Style. Obsessed with defeating strong opponents, especially Reina Alcott after a humiliating loss.
• Heidemarie – Noble “villainess”; drill-curls, level 70, blessing paralyses weaker people, loves duels.
• Lucia – A female classmate of Reina with the (Regeneration) blessing, a power of immense value, unaware of the world government’s interest in her abilities.
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Edited by Kanaa-senpai.
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